[Solved] 2nd mediation question

Hi Colin

Sorry you're having a hard time, must be very difficult for you.

My advice would be to write everything down that you want to say, possibly worth taking evidence of communication to back up what you're saying, this can often save time and keep you on track, especially if finances are going to limit the sessions you can have. It's great that the contact has been running smoothly though.

Have you checked if you are entitled to Legal Aid for Mediation? If you are, this might allow for more sessions?

Regarding the medical and education side of things, have a look at this link, it might give you more of an idea of what you can do;
http://www.thecustodyminefield.com/flapp/prmenu.html

Hi 1626

yea the contact has just she keeps changing goal posts. but keep persevering,

I am not entittled to legal aid 🙁

The problem is I know what I can do but she doesnt and wont speak to anyone about anything. Makes it really difficult to communicate. I tell her thing and she says her work collegues tell her I am lieing. (and before you think it she works for a well known supermarket stacking shelves, Nothing wrong with that. I am meaning they are not legally trained) Already told her the dog goes anywhere near our son again I will take him away from her under the child safty act. I know I shouldnt off but had no choice. I got to protect him. If it was other way round she would stop me seeing him besides I would have the dog gone.

Is a nursary classed as Education? I think so but I dont know.

Anyway. She cancelled today because our lad is poorly (teething). So Now got to wait till the mediator sorts out another meeting.

More important my lad is eventually having teeth. Just over 12 months old and no teeth gutted,. Long story short all my friends and family have children younger then him and they all have teeth. So happy daddy now.

Thank you again 1626

Colin

Hi Colin,

Your ex really does push doesn't she.

I would contact the mediator and let them know before the session that it must only last for 1 hour as you can't afford to pay for more, express that if it does over run then you will not pay as you have expressed 1 hour only, do it politely though 😉

I would share your concern over the dog if it's bitten once then I would be worried about it happening again, again bring this up in mediation.

The biggest issue you have as we have said before is that anything agreed isn't legally binding so effectively she isn't doing wrong (in the eyes of the law) but not following it, I know that doesn't help you at all and actually makes it worse.

If you keep making agreements in mediation and she doesn't stick to them then it may be time to look at court, but try as hard as you can to keep from that.

GTTS

Hey gtt

I know. I really dont want to go court. Scared isnt a word I use lightly but I am genuinely frightened. No one should ever be scared like this.Work have been so good but dont want to push my luck with them. So put on a brave face and plod day by day.

She thinks its just one big joke. How many time do you go mediation before you say enough? The mediators are just money grabbers. 4 hours last time and to just get told this is what theyd do in court. I could of done that in 5 minutes. I am trying to follow what we agreed. In fact I am. but she keeps changing it. knowing I have not got the money for it. So she drags it out. I want to sort it out fairly but shes a child about it. She wont let me even take him nersary. But I can pick him up from there. Work that out? lol. drives me bonkers. I know its such a petty thing. But I just want to share My lad and let him grow up knowing. We are both there and do everything between us for him.

Regarding dog. I have but at the time saw red. I have mentioned it since but a little more subtle and asked if she has made sure our son doesnt need a tetanis. To which we had a huge arguement about the definition of broken skin. I wouldnt mind but my job kind of deals with that sort of thing.

You're right what you say about Mediators been money grabbing f*****s they come in joint second with Solicitors as the most vile people on the planet only just pipped at the post by Cafftwats in my book.

Don't be scared of the courts mate it really isn't that bad, it's sort of empowering in a way and it feels good to start the fight for your child, you pay £215 and that's it if you're representing yourself, I too had all the [censored] your getting off your ex and it felt great not having to put up with it no more.

You will get tonnes of advice off peeps on here and you're ex will be laughing on the other side of her face trust me when you get going and what you get at the end of it will be set in stone.

I would consider having a word with the police about the dog just so it's recorded.

Slim has given you good advice. You might also qualify for a reduction or exemption of court fees. Have a look at form ex160 online. Also, look through all the stickys in the Legal Eagle section on representing yourself, there's some excellent advice there.

Don't be scared of the process, it's not as daunting as it seems, plenty of Dads on here do and your ex just sounds awkward rather than having serious issues.

If money is an issue and you're scared of going it alone, look up the Bar Pro Bono unit, you have to be referred via an MP. You can also call the Legal Aid helpline, they might be able to put you in touch with a local Pro Bono unit where student Lawyers or Barristers can help. Check your home insurance policy, sometimes there is legal cover included. There's also the option of using a McKenzie Friend, they're unregulated so make sure you get a recommendation, there's some excellent ones out there, my partner has used this option and found it a great help 🙂