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[Solved] Where do I start?


Posts: 8
Registered
Topic starter
(@Joe_jenks)
Active Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Hi all,

Im in need of some pointers or advice on where I stand.

My son is due in just over 2 wks time which is fantastic, however what isnt so fantastic is the mothers attitude and basic outlook on everything to do with me.

we are not together have tried over the last 8 months to try and work things out for the sake of our unborn son. It didnt work out as i'd hoped.

she has a new partner who she has been with for 3 months, that isnt a issue for me. The problem is with her attitude towards me she has a very vicous mouth and when we argue says the whole your not going to be involved, you havent been here etc my partner will be more of a dad than you etc

Through out her pregnacy I have made sure she has had everythign she needs, each month since we found out she was pregnant ive been finacially supporting her in every way possible. She has everything her and my son needs.

Its gotten to a point now where she is telling me its going to be her way or the high way, Ive spoken to a legal advise line in work and they have pretty much said until my son is born there isnt alot I can do.

Im not trying to jump in all guns blazing and getting into some horrible legal battle with her, I just want to know where I stand and what rights I have? As im sure that depending oh what ever mood she is in will determine if she wnats to be nasty or nice and let me see my son

4 Replies
4 Replies
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(@Nannyjane)
Joined: 12 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 5426

Hi there and welcome 🙂

I'm sorry to say that until the baby is born, you have no rights. Do you know if you will be on the birth certificate? That would be helpful, but if she doesnt put you on it you can apply for Parental Responsibility.

Once the baby is born, if she is refusing contact then you have two options, you can try mediation or you can go to court for a defined contact order. If you arn't on the birth certificate, you could apply for both at the same time.

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(@Joe_jenks)
Joined: 12 years ago

Active Member
Posts: 8

Thanks for the reply,

At the moment I have no reason think I wouldnt be on the Birth certificate but then again it will really come down to the attitude of the mother and how awkward she wants to be. Ive been reading up on alot of the helpful topics on this site and must admitt has but my mind at ease a bit and I understand a bit more about what I can do etc

Currently in the mind set of trying not to worry to much about something that hasnt happened yet but then again from reading various topics who knows how things may go.

but ive had pretty much 9 months of just emotional blackmail and verbal abuse from the mother of the child regardless of the fact that if i hadn't of being doing what I have finacially for her, her and my son would have nothing and would be struggling.

But the finacial side isnt or never will be an issue as I want to do everything I can for him, not his fault things are the way they are

but the thing that bugs me and what the mother doesnt seem to grasp is that she keeps saying ive only been there finacially and nothing else, yet everypoint along the way when Ive asked to do stuff and help and be there more she point blank refuses to let me be more involved. Which makes her sole argument one big contradiction.

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(@Nannyjane)
Joined: 12 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 5426

Hi,
I do understand, pregnancy can cause all sorts of emotional highs and lows and pregnant women are notorious for their bad behaviour!
With any luck once the baby is born, things will settle down and there may be a way forward for you all.

Good luck with everything 🙂

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(@Joe_jenks)
Joined: 12 years ago

Active Member
Posts: 8

yeah i can appreciate that carrign a child for 9 months is a job in itself and i will never know whats that like, hormones must be running wild but the mother of my child was a bit crazy before she was pregnant so this behaviour was there before and im certain it will be there after.

just got to roll with the punches for the time being and see how thigns pan out, hopefully there will be no problems but I know anything she can do to make things more awkward than they already are she will

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