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Hi,
5 years ago my daughter's mum left and took our daughter with her. We were not getting on due to me not being able to find work and she basically said she didn't need me and would be better off without me.
So of course I've acted like a prat since then. Work has been terrible since only dipping in and out of work. I've not been able to keep with maintenance.
My 7yo daughter and I are smitten with each other, its just I find my ex very intimidating (feels stupid saying that out loud) Mediation has been set up by me 3 times and I've completely bottled it. I've now not seen my daughter for nearly 9months and only get to speak to her on the day of the week my mother has her. I was allowed to see her on those days before but she's banned that now. I started writing my daughter letters (passed on by my mother) just asking what she's been up to, hows school that sort of thing but now her mum says she won't even give me her new address as she doesn't feel 'comfortable' with the letters.
Im not the worst person in the world, I've never laid a hand on them or abused them in anyway just been a massive idiot and basically she seems to have all the control. She also seems to saying stuff to my daughter who on the last time we spoke was petrified she'd get into trouble with her mum for talking to me and rang her to check it was alright ' which shocked me'
The whole family even hers are walking round on egg shells. I have no clue what to do?
Hi, short of agreeing with the mum (which doesn't sound like it will happen), your only other choice is mediation and if you cannot reach agreement, court. Court is not a pleasant experience so avoid that if you can & mediation is now compulsory before making an application.
Contact and finances are two separate issues but a lot of mums use the financial side of things to justify reducing or stopping contact.
You might qualify for Legal Aid for mediation, contact National Family Mediation or go on their website to find out.
You could try writing a letter to the mum laying out your position and see what reaction you get before approaching mediation.
Good luck π
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