[Solved] What to put forward at an FHDRA

Hi,

Can I recommend you look at the sticky posts in legal Eagle. There is one titled first hearing that has all the information you need.

TheDaddy

Thanks. I couldn't see the thread you have named (perhaps because I'm using my phone?) but have gleamed info from other similar threads.

Hi there and welcome back

Two years is a long time and this would be the main reason a contact centre would be the first step if the court decide to make an order.

Your partner should be contacted by CAFCASS before the hearing for the purpose of providing the court with a brief report on the current situation, whether there are any safeguarding issues and whether they should have continued involvement in the case. He should be given the opportunity to discuss what he would like to happen with the adviser, but it might be a good idea to write a short position statement for the benefit of the court, just to give a little background and what your partner would like to happen.

As there hasn't been contact for a long time, the court isn't likely to make an order for interim contact at the first hearing, they will probably want to have a further more detailed report complied for the second hearing. He can make the court aware that he would be prepared to start contact in a contact centre whilst a bond is re established.

It's best to be open about the past and try to avoid any mud slinging, remaining calm and child focused is the best way to move things forward. If all goes well, there are no significant safe guarding issues and the judge is fair and thorough, your partner should see progress over a period of six months or so, that is a very rough guesstimate though so I would encourage patience!

There's a search engine on the forum and you can access it from the tab at the top of the page (under the Dad.info logo) if you search for position statements there you will find plenty of info but if you have any questions please don't hesitate to ask.

Thanks Mojo.
I helped my partner to draft a position statement using a link I found from here. Today he has received a letter from his ex's solicitor stating that they will be putting together the court bundle as he is a litigant in person and she has instructed them to act on her behalf. This bundle will include a position statement from her so he is eager to see this, and reluctant to send his in this case.
We're a bit baffled as to why she did not engage in mediation if she is able to afford/access funds for a solicitor's involvement. She previously used this solicitor to arrange the informal agreement they originally had. (Again after she stopped contact repeatedly and without warning).
CAFCASS have sent a letter to say they will be calling him this Thursday.

This sounds like her solicitors are just adding extras so that they can charge her more! Some solictors like to do a bundle before every hearing, but apart from the aplication forms and her PS there's nothing much for them to include at this stage.

They can't include a PS or any other documents in the bundle that haven't been filed with the court first, and a copy of any paperwork that either party files with the court must also be sent to the other party too.

At what point does your partner want to hand over his PS to the court? If he wants to wait until the day of the first hearing, before going into court, then he must ensure he has copies of it to give to the other side and CAFCASS.

If youwould like a copy of her PS, write back and ask when they would like to exchange Position Statements, make them aware that you would like your PS included and request that they send you a copy of the index for your records prior to filing. Send a copy of your correspondence, with their letter attached to the court too.

When he gets the call from CAFCASS he should remain calm and child focused, open and honest. They won't want to hear him bad mouthing the mother, but he can express concerns for his childs well being in respect of contact being stopped and started with no good reason and the need for children to have close loving relationships with both parents. Children thrive when they have the consistency and security of having both parents fully involved in their lives.... This is the kind of thing CAFCASS respond positively to....it musn't be about what he wants but what is best for the child, if he keeps that at the front of his discussion with CAFCASS he will be fine.

Best of luck 🙂

My partner has today received the CAFCASS letter to the court and the court bundle from his ex's solicitor.
To put it mildly I'm very upset. There are points in her position statement which were not brought up by the CAFCASS officer and are not in the CAFCASS letter so have been, frankly, made up by her after the event.
- Either she, or her solicitor, is making it sound like my partner has been awkward regarding contact when all of the problems with contact have stemmed from her.
- She has accused him of violence and aggression which are untrue. Claiming she left him because she was scared he would become violent (this is personally insulting to me as I was previously in an abusive marriage and she mocked me for "playing the victim" when she found out!) however, she previously stated he could see the children at her house (which he refused due to the negative environment). If she was scared of him then why would she do that?
- She claims the time she attacked him (and was taken in by police) that the police believed she had punched him in self defence (although the police never questioned him further about this). She admits at the time of the assault she was intoxicated and does not remember it clearly (bearing in mind this was at a handover and it occurred because he refused to give the children back to her as she could barely stand) but in another paragraph claims she has concerns regarding his alcohol consumption when caring for the children but he does not drink and has never been a drinker, even family celebrations he does not drink at because he is always driving.
- She claims we allowed the children to watch inappropriate films which has caused them nightmares (I have no recollection of them watching inappropriate films and nor do my children watch films which are out of their maturity bracket) but when they were staying here his eldest was scared to go to bed often because he claims his mother had told him the bunk bed was unsafe and would collapse and that there were monsters at our house (I am aware this could be pure imagination and he was using "mommy said" to make it more credible but I also know that she is completely able to implant these ideas)
- She claims she saw him strike their youngest child across the face because he would not eat his vegetables. This is entirely untrue and couldn't possibly be accurate as their youngest was 7 months old when they separated and they did not do baby led weaning so how could he have been protesting about vegetables in the first place?!
- She claims during the argument which we regrettably had with my partner's mother I grabbed the eldest son causing marks to his shoulders and wrists. Also false, I put my hands out for him to come with me at which point my mother in law grabbed him around the legs and wouldn't let him come to me so I did not even make contact. She also claims we were aggressive towards my partner's parents at this point. Also false, my partner's father was not even present and it was his mother doing all the screaming, we just collected the children and left. There was shouting but mostly from his mother, all I did was tell her I wouldn't be bringing the new baby to see her to which she said she didn't care and I then cried in the car for an hour whilst taking the children home. There is a claim that after this altercation the eldest told his mother that I had previously smacked him, which I never have.
- She claims the children are reluctant to be around me. Prior to this argument and her subsequent withdrawal of contact, I had bonded very well with these boys and they used to come to me for cuddles when upset or tired.
- She claims family members have told her that my partner has become more aggressive over the past 12 months. My partner only has contact with one family member and they do not have contact with her so I do not know how she has obtained this "information".
- She claims my partner was abusive to her at handovers when in actual fact it was often her making threats and stating "I'm keeping a folder, they'll know the truth when they're older". My partner's only comments to her were either rebuttals or information regarding the boys' welfare. We had a contact book for a while but she stopped this so handovers can't have been that problematic or she'd have kept the book and not had any communication at all.
- She claims to have concerns that the children will witness adult conflict at our home if they are to spend time here. We do not have a conflict filled relationship. I am fully aware that she is saying this so that she can claim that if my ex husband was abusive then of course it's likely I'll put up with another unhealthy relationship.

The chronology the solicitor has put together is inaccurate and does not include the previous times when his ex has ceased contact or changed arrangements on a whim.

I gave my partner advice regarding the CAFCASS call, mostly not to indulge in mud slinging which has resulted in the report containing 4 safeguarding points from her and only one from him (although he raised two)

I know it is not possible to do anything about the CAFCASS report (even though there are some inaccuracies) and their recommendation is pretty standard anyway (possibility of my partner attending a parenting course, possibly attending SPIP) and says no further involvement is required from them.
He is going to email his position statement to her solicitor (and post it to them and the court) but I was wondering if he should address what is said in hers? Also, should he add comments regarding the chronology as dates are wrong and instances of problems with contact are not noted (obviously she's missed out anything that made her look bad).

Personally, I would write to the solicitor and point out the inaccuracies in the chronology but it's not likely to result in them amending them.

You don't need to go into too much detail in the Position Statement as this is a first hearing, you could address the allegations using a couple of brief sentences in your PS to say that they are untrue. Unless the court has specified a deadline for filing a PS (which would be highly unusual) you can take the statement with you on the day and give her solicitor a copy then as well as handing a copy to the usher for the judge to read before you go in.

If you would like one of us to look it over for you, please feel free to PM.

Good luck

Thanks for your reply. He has added a paragraph to say he does not deem the position statement an appropriate place to address unfounded allegations and will provide a longer statement if the court wishes for him to do so.

It's up to the court to decide what is appropriate and the Position Statement is the place for parents to put forward their concerns to the judge.

You would be better to put something along the lines of 'I have had sight of the mother's PS, I consider her allegations to be untrue and will happily respond to these in detail whichever way the court decides to be appropriate'.

Some judges can be quite uppity, they might not like being told what should be deemed as appropriate 🙂

It's worded like this....

It is my intention in this statement to address the future wellbeing and positive relationship between my children and me, thus I will not use this brief document to address unfounded accusations made by Miss X. I will be happy to provide a full statement to this end, should the court wish.

I'm sure that's fine. Remember to try and keep the statement to a couple of pages and in brief.....Good luck!