Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hi every one i posted a while ago about my ex failing to attend a drug test. Then when she finally went she failed the drug test.
Well things happened very quickly. Exs boyfriend was banned from having any contact with my girl. My ex claimed they wernt together he wasnt a risk and instantly ignored the prohibited steps order. We found out and refused to take her back to her mum. Put in the paper work for enforcement order and made our judge aware of what was going on. With our paperwork we had a date set for March. My ex however tried going to a different judge and lying to have my lil girl returned to her. We that judge sussed something wasnt right and refused emergency removal but did order an emergency hearing with us both with our usual judge!! Our judge hit the roof. Told her she was a lying manipulative evil woman and the drug test alone gave me reasons to not return my girl. First interim care order granted to me but only until my other hearing in March (was 3 weeks away) granted school change the works! Next hearing ex didnt even turn up. Interim order granted until may 29th.
Now when she was with her mum she never ever had an entire week in school with out being too Ill to go. Or late multiple times. She wasnt taken to appointments. Hadnt seen a dentist in 3 years
Weve got her medical and dental all up to date. Shes not been late once or had any random illnesses that her mum claimed she had.
A few days ago I saw something on Facebook about the Jeremy Kyle show. Very very vague but my wife instantly said put it on. Its exs boyfriend. Not a chance all that was said was ad on jezza. But she was right. In the audience was my ex. Introduced as his girlfriend. He was on for trying to stab someone and him being on a cocktail of drugs daily.
My ex swore they wernt together. He wasnt a risk and they wernt on drugs. Clearly lying!!
I have cafcass coming out this week. But honestly I'm scared. If cafcass send her home the danger my daughter would be in is keeping me up at night.
Hi again
I remember your previous posts, it must be a relief to have your child with you considering the awful situation with your ex.
I completely understand your fears, but try and step back from the emotional side of things... difficult I know, but if you can it will help you to see it more clearly. For a start, the judge is unlikely to order a change of schools, if he felt placing your child with you was only going to be temporary. The outrage that he directed at her also speaks loudly of his opinion of her.
You must carry on putting your case forward, if you can get a letter from the school to state that she is now attending regularly that would be helpful. You should copy off her dental appointment card to show that you have taken care of that too.
Concerning the Jeremy Kyle show, if you can get it downloaded onto a tablet or smart phone, you can take it with you to the next hearing. Prepare a brief position statement to tell the court about it and say that you have a downloaded recording of it with you, if the court wishes to see it. If you can get a recording of the show and transcribe it onto paper, word for word, with some photos of her and her boyfriend taken from the screen, or as a screenshot, you could mention that in your position statement too, and that you have that with you if the court would give you permission to file it.
As there is an interim order for your child to stay with you, only the court can change that. CAFCASS can make recommendations, but are they likely to tell the judge he was wrong, by recommending in their report that your daughter should be returned to the mother...I very much doubt it.
I think you’re on track, but you mustn’t get complacent, remember that the judge will want to dot all the I’s and cross all the T’s and follow procedure... but it looks favourable.
You’re doing great and it looks like you’re on the home run...all the best.
I can't see how the judge will change his mind - everything your ex is doing is making it worse for her. I would be going for supervised contact for her at a contact centre, and for far longer than the usual 6 months.
Shes currently having supervised contact at her parents house. Yet unsupervised in the community.
It’s highly likely she will mess up, at which point you can ask that contact be supervised in a contact centre... it’s not going to be easy... she will continue to lie about her drug use and her relationships, but I’m pretty sure she will come unstuck... we’ve seen it here with other members, it just means you will have to keep a close eye on everything, maybe it would be useful to keep a written record with dates and times.
All the best
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.