[Solved] What are my success chances

Hi there

At 10 your daughter would be listened to, but it would be weighed together with welfare reports, which could include any input from the school.

The only time you can forego mediation prior to making a court application, is if it is applied for as an emergency/urgent application, if there are serious risks of harm for example. If you consider that there is immediate risk to her, then you could go ahead and try for an urgent hearing.

Have you involved Social Services? It might be worth giving them a call to talk about your concerns, asking them to log your conversation.

It’s impossible to predict outcomes, a lot is down to the calibre of judge on the day... but if you have the school behind you, with your daughters wishes and feelings, it’s possible., but there are no guarantees unfortunately.

Best of luck

Thank you kindly for your reply. I have a lot to consider and not going to rush into a decision.
Thanks for your advice.

hi wild,

at the end of my final hearing, i tried picking my barristers brains. I asked him what are the chances of success if i was to return to court for a shared care order e.g. in a year to a few years time (kids aged 5 and 3 right now). he thought i would be wasting my time, as its increasingly difficult to get shared care arrangements, as courts prefer to let kids stay with one parent, as it gives them stability and routine. he also said, as there is zero direct communication between me and ex, that will also go against the idea of shared care, as there needs to be proper communication and co-parenting between parents. it needs to be a workable arrangment. i think i will wait till my kids are old enough to go to and from school on their own, before i can think about shared care arrangements etc.

i think for you, it could be a nasty long-drawn battle if you want residenc of kids, especially if your ex will fight it tooth and nail. the main thing that could go in your favour, would be child neglect at the hands of your ex.

Maybe your barrister was having a bad day Bill... it’s actually becoming easier to get a shared care arrangement in place, purely from past experience and what I’ve read on various legal sites.

In my opinion, it’s always worth asking for, as it isn’t about having an equal amount of time with the kids, it’s more about equalising each parents position, as the child lives with the parent they are staying with, so effectively they have two homes.

It’s said that parents have to get on for this type of order, but again I’ve known it happen where there has been a strained relationship. What is important is living close to each other, so that both parents can drop the children at school and get more involved with activities at the weekends.

hi mojo,

i suppose every barrister/solicitor has their own perspective/take on it. he told me that recently he represented a dad that wanted shared care. in the end the case got thrown out, as judges concluded that children were not being affected, it was just the parents being hostile and bitter to each other and thats why it ended up in court. for my situation, my kids are very young and i can probably only commit to 1-2 school pickups or drop offs a week. my ex opposes all midweek overnight contact & sun-mon overnights., which doesnt help the situation. i will consider all this when my kids are old enough to go to school on their own.