URGENT: sending documents to other party

Hello!

How exactly has your ex breached the existing order and how many times has she done it in that manner?

hi,

write it in a position statement format. bullet/number point of all the dates of when ex breached order, and how. often the enforcement becomes a variation of order, so you could use this chance to gain more time with child. if kids school attendance and lateness has been bad under mothers care, write it down if you have the stats and compare with schools target.

you mention your ex interprets order differently. in what way? if she messing around with school holidays, ask for holidays to be shared equally, and alternate weekends to apply during holidays. if you want 50/50 in general, then you could ask for that too.

@mrstrange Sorry for the late reply but I have been busy yesterday filling up all the documents. 

She did it twice. Once was at the end of the lockdown, when my daughter was supposed to go back to school. 

She asked me if I could drop her to school on her first day. I asked her to confirm as I had to realize my work around it. She did confirm. 

On Sunday, I texted her to see how we should organize the pick up and she literally told me that my daughter will not stay with me that night. I asked her how I was supposed to drop my daughter at school and she said that I will not drop her at school as she changed her mind. 

Second time is for this summer holidays. She booked time for holidays in August and just gave me the dates. 

No asking, gave me the date. Those days are out of the order for her, so during my time. 

Plus those dates doesn't arrange me at all. She told me that she can't cancel it as she booked it already. 

Means that she booked some time off without even asking. 

Now, on the order, it says that any extra time should be agreed between the 2 parties. 

The first time we agreed on something and she changes her mind without any good reason and didn't even told me. Second time, well this one is very clear. 

@bill337 Sorry for the late reply but I was busy filling up all the documents yesterday. 

So my sollicitor called me yesterday morning and decided to give me free advice. 

I completed a C120, and I send all the proof for my ex breaching the order. All the proofs for her allegations on cafcass. 

The solicitor of my ex replied and told me that the court never gave me permission to complete a C120. I called tge Court and apparently it will be ok. The judge will only focus on tge proofs that my ex breach the order for the moment. 

So tge court order says:

- every Monday night with me

- every other weekend from Friday after school until Tuesday morning with me

- except for Christmas holidays that has to be shared equally with one Christmas week every other year with the other parent. 

- Easter holidays shared equally

- 2 weeks in Summer with me

- any further contact has to be agreed between the 2 parties

So my ex told me that because the court order doesn't say anything about half term, she give me a favor by letting me having my daughter.

She booked holidays for last half term saying that it wasn't my time with her anyway. 

I told her that the order just says that I have her every Monday and every other weekend, and that's include half term. 

The only exceptions are specified on the order. 

All of this by message. 

Now regarding school runs. 

I live 20 minutes drive from my daughter's school. My ex lives 5 minutes walk. 

Her concern for cafcass report was that i jave been late sometimes and my daughter's hair hasn't been brushed properly sometimes. 

I recueved the school attendance for this year. My daughter has been late 12 times. 7 with me and 5 with her mom. 

Other than that my daughter's school report is excellent, even better than that!

For brushing hair, well I explained that I do brush her hair but she has a full day at school so sometimes she can have messy hair. I pick her up from school with messy hair sometimes as well. 

I really want a 50/50 because I'm tired of all this. I know that a 50/50 would protect t my daughter's time with both of us. 

@papa2015 

I think you need new child arrangement orders that are precise, robust and enforceable. 

@papa2015 if order says you get 2 weeks in summer, and that's what you had in summer, your ex will probably argue that she did not breach the order. if theres no mention of half-term holidays, you may need to push for order to be varied, and ask court to make it more specific and defined. probably better to ask for all holidays to be shared equally, that way helps remove any grey areas for your ex to play with. how old is child? perhaps can seek 50/50 equal shared care in general.

@bill337 yes that's what she will try to say about summer. The thing is I always let her having her holidays with our daughter the previous years, because the court order doesn't say that she should have two weeks in Summer with our daughter as well but it is normal for me that my daughter has 2 weeks with her mom as well as me. 

The point is that the order we have now is still very specific about the time. 

It is every other weekend with me except for half Christmas, half Easter and 2 weeks in Summer with me. So for half term, the weekend system carry on. 

For summer, the problem is that she didn't talk to me before taking those 2 weeks off. 

She just impose it. 

So even if I have my 2 weeks in Summer, the extra time she takes in August as well is on the time I have with my daughter and without talking to me before. 

She also tried to change thing at Christmas. 

Christmas is every other year spending Christmas week with each parent. The reason is because my family is abroad and thus is the only way to spend Christmas with my family every other year. 

She wanted to divide boxing day and Christmas and change the arrangement. The problem is that I can't travel Christmas and boxing day so it means that I will never be able to take my daughter abroad for Christmas anymore. My family is my daughter's family as well. 

For Easter, the arrangement order says that the holidays has to be shared equally. 

My daughter had 17 days at Easter this year. My ex wanted me to have my daughter for 7 days because she was seeing it as one week with me and the rest with her. 

A 50/50 for me is the only way. To be honest we are not very far from a 50/50 with the actual order.