[Solved] update on contact

Mine used to say the same thing, that I had to see our son in a contact centre until he could speak. The fact that so many women independently come up with very similar reasons is fascinating.

I don’t think there’s much point arguing with her at this point. Pragmatically speaking, the court looks at how much time you have been spending with your child and builds from that, so it makes sense to agree to whatever she says, then slowly push for more until you are in court.

To agree to 2 hours every fortnight and then “negotiate” to weekly but only for one hour is just ridiculous, but again, from an objective point of view, take it, it will help you when you are back in court, to be able to say I’ve been seeing our son every week.

reading your story, things like “you can only see your son with my brother present”, used to make my blood boil, now it just simmers. By giving so much power to the woman, the law creates these aberrations which ultimately hurt children because they end up being denied a loving and capable parent which you are.

Sounds all too familiar.

You only have to take a read at some of the posts and advice given on so called "mum's sites" mumsnet is a good one to laugh at.
the advice about how best to keep him back under control and stop him "taking your kids away" etc...etc... is hilarious to read through.....whereas most groups / forums i've found for fathers trying to find help to see their kids gives totally real help and advice, what you can and can't do etc...

doesn't help when you get solicitors rubbing their grubby little hands counting the cash coming in as they pitt you against each other.

if only these so called mothers (not sexist just a realistic majority!) if they just put aside their anger and vengence towards you where the kids are concerned! they really do not see the damage they are casuing the kids....and then when it's too late and the kids are affected by it then "it's all their worthless fathers fault"...boils the blood not just the urine!

then that makes me sound bitter.......[censored] yes i am....sorry....but there was never any need for this if these so called mothers would just allow the kids to have a peacefull life with both parents

well i think the best deal we have managed is for me to see my son next weekend and weekend after for an hour in a public place, she will allow me to see him on christmas eve for 2 hours and expects me to give him his christmas presents in a public place like mcdonalds...i dont agree with that 1 bit so i might just hold his stuff back and explain to court that i didint think it a suitable setting to be handing my child his christmas presents when social services have told her there is no problems

Then she says "if all goes well then i will consider 2 hours every weekend supervised by my brother but you are not having my son alone until we been to court"

She basically doing whats in her best interests around her schedule and i have to follow that....and i will and bite my tongue and make notes ready for court to show she is still being controlling 🙂

It's all about control....the only way she can keep control of the situation is by controlling you in the only ways she can find....contact with your kids.

as you say keep making notes and if she has put any of this in writing produce it as evidence when you submitt your position statements if asked.