[Solved] Unsupervised contact with 11-12 month old?

To be honest, at this point, as unfair as it seems, if that is all that's on offer, I would take it. It could take a couple of months to get your first court hearing and if you don't have any contact for that period of time, it's likely a court would order contact to start in a centre anyway, until you and your daughter get to know one another a bit better.

If you take the supervised contact now, hopefully by the time you reach court, the next obvious step would be to come out the centre.

Hi Chris.

I've went through and close to the final hearing of my little boy who was 18months when I first started the court process.

From what I gather and through people I knows experience is that with a child that young they are likely to suggest a progressive build up and that what happened to me. If there are no safeguarding issues then the build up is quicker, I had some allegations against me and it just took a little longer to ticking the boxes the courts wants to progress the contact.

My ex refused visits before the first hearing and I was stubborn and refused the contact center because I felt it was a total liberty. When I got to the courts I ended up with supervised anyway and just delayed the process going forward until I cleared the false allegations. Second hearing I have unsupervised now 6hrs sat/sun and one weekday evening and going overnights in October so it does go forward.

My personal opinion is take Yoda's advice and start it as quick as you can as positive contact centre reports will only do you good when come to court and improve your chances of going forward quicker.

Good luck.

Hi, I'm going through a similar situation and my ex is refusing to allow contact unless through a contact centre which I've now been attending for more than 6 months because of delays claiming legal aid. If you can't afford it, the fee's are waived if you're claiming benefits - I'm not sure what happens if you're working but I'm sure they will help out if you can prove your case.

Take every single moment that you're offered with your daughter - even putting how it looks in court aside, it will be good for both of you and allow you to build a bond with her and give you the confidence to be able to look after her without help. As she grows older that bond will be very important and make life a lot easier if you're already comfortable being around each other.

You don't mention why your ex is refusing contact - are there any safeguarding issues or is she just not confident that you can look after your daughter without help?

From everything I've heard, the courts now do everything they can to ensure that both parents are involved in childrens lives. I don't know how true it is but my friend spoke to someone recently who said that they'd been in jail for several years for drug possession and had still been granted equal access (shared care) of his children. If you have no criminal record and there are no other issues I should imagine you'll get a reasonable amount of time with your daughter, even if it takes a few hearings to go through.

Best of luck.

Thanks for you response guy's i think you've confirmed what i already knew. It just seems unfair to be forced to use a contact center when it's clearly being done out of spite. It doesn't help reduce any tension which is no good for my daughter.I guess that's life though.

Paul_6611

We were only together very briefly before she fell pregnant. I didn't handle the situation particularly we'll so she's probably angry\hurt about that. But I've never lost my temper with her and I've been to see my daughter every weekend.

I'm perfectly capable of caring for her, and have a supportive family that are happy to help me. She isn't as settled with me as she is with her mum, but that's never going to improve if her mum doesn't back off a little bit.

I think she doesn't want me to be involved in the child's life tbh and doesn't want to let her baby go.

It doesn't make sense. Why mothers across the country are restricting access to children when dad's are as capable of caring for them as the mothers. Sure there are probably guys out there who haven't got a clue.

I don't understand what the incentive is? Is it money, spite, selfishness, fear of being alone, complications when new partners are involved, fear that the children will want to stay with dad permanently? I've been trying to get my head round this for way too long - I would never have treated my ex the same way she's treated me if the situation was the other way round. It makes no sense. It hurts the children as much as the dads.

How do i go about sorting supervised visits at contact centre as ive just been granted supervised visits till court is over with pls help im missing my little girl she 1 in 2week

You can search for a centre here... https://www.naccc.org.uk/

The first time you attend they will have a small interview with you to find out the circumstances of your case.