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Hi all
Just wondering your thoughts on the this...
I attended an MIAM assessment around 3 weeks ago now. This was instigated by me because my wife was withholding access to my children.
The mediator made several attempts to contact my wife but she did not respond. My wife instead contacted me and said she refuses to go to mediation unless I pay for her to go. I explained this is a process for both of us to benefit from, so therefore I was not willing to pay for her fee. I explained to her that she has 10 days to respond to the mediator after which I will be left with no option but to apply for a Court order for Child arrangements.
Nothing more was said... the mediator signed off her section of the paperwork to say I had attended the MIAM but my wife had not. And hence I submitted my C100 forms to the court about a week ago.
Today, I had a call from my wife asking me what was happening about 'this whole mediation thing and when am I going to pay for her to go?' ..... I was a bit shocked. I said... well its too late, you had your opportunity but the time has lapsed and I have now filed for a court order which is currently being processed and you will be notified shortly of a hearing date.
She laughed at me down the phone and said 'you don't stand a chance'.
Anyway... I think when she actually receives a copy of the paperwork it will really shock her. And I expect her to suddenly decide she wants to mediate at any cost!
What are the thoughts ... should I revert back to mediation or continue to court????
She is very up and down, never keeps to her word and considers herself to be above the law, so whatever the outcome. I would like it to be legally binding.
I just want the quickest least expensive way of seeing my children again!
Thanks
V
Hi again,
Court should always be avoided wherever possible as it can make the relationship between the parents more difficult but sometimes it is unavoidable.
Speaking from my partner's case; he tried for over 18 months to mediate & agree with the mother and spent a fortune. She was very up & down and constantly changed her mind, leaving my partner with a court application as his only option to get a stable arrangement for his child.
An agreement made in Mediation is not legally binding although you can ask the courts to formalise one of these at a cost.
The danger with court is that you might end up with a decision that doesn't suit either of you. You know your ex best and how contact would likely to be played out in future and whether you need the agreement to be legal.
The courts welcome any agreement the parents can make so you could consider trying to agree or Mediate and present this to the court at the directions hearing? If there are any issues you are unable to agree on, you could ask the court to make a decision on those?
Hope that helps a bit :unsure:
I think that's really good advice 1626 has given.
If she shows any inclination towards mediation in court they could well adjourn the case so that this can go ahead anyway.
If she is on any benefits then she may be entitled to funding to pay for the mediation too and you can check that here
www.gov.uk/check-legal-aid
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