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Hello all
I have recently been posting here in regards to my situation and have had some great advice from people.
I got to the stage where mediation failed in December and I received the relevant paperwork in order to apply to the courts for an arrangement order.
I have three children between the ages of one and ten years old, who I haven't seen since March last year.
I was communicating with my eldest via text message for a short period from July to August when it stopped, this is where things turned sour, with my ex corresponding with my solicitor via hers saying she will not agree to contact ,and my eldest does not want to see me.
What was worse is that my solicitor received a hand written letter that was written signed by my eldest son, who was 9 at the time stating he didn't want to see me.
Although it was obvious by the handwriting that it was written by a child, the language within it stood out as not being words etc a child could use. My solicitor also thinks he was influenced by someone else to write it.
Moving on, I set up a mediation appointment in where me and my ex attended separate, although it didn't progress. The paperwork was received shortly afterwards.
I filled this out with my solicitor and at the last minute- I couldn't send it!
The night before I couldn't sleep, I had hundreds of things going around my head. The next day I left work as I just couldn't function. I went to see my doctor who put me on some pills which have helped. I think I'm just overwhelmed- I got to the stage where I couldn't think straight and I became anxious. I'm worried that my eldest won't ever want to see me, that's painful. I'm worried how long this will go on for and what till it will take on me emotionally etc.
I'm also worried about the financial part also, I can't afford to have a solicitor represent me in court as it's just too expensive. I want to represent myself but it does scare me and I feel out of my depth - I'm sure others have felt the same.
I've kept myself together and I think I've done well, then Xmas I fell apart. I feel a lot better now I had taken some time off work and have been sleeping due to the medication.
Now I'm worried that I'm leaving too long as I've not had any contact with them for 10 months, but I want to feel strong and confident before going forward.
How long can I hold on before it will go against me?
If you want to represent yourself, then look at using a professional McKenzies friend - this will be much cheaper than a solicitor and will help you to prepare and hopefully attend the hearing with you (though you speak, not them). I think this migh help your emotional state also, as you will hoepfully feel that you are a little more in control of the situation, or at the very least, being more proactive about it.
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