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Just after xmas my wife told me our marriage was over. We have been together 18 years and have 3 children and live in the UK.
Our house and all of our possessions are in joint names because we combined everything when we got married.
Our finances are quite unbalanced with my wife earning half of my salary. Also, when we bought the house I put all my savings into it and a sizeable gift from my parents. My wife did not have any finances to bring to the marriage but has contributed her earnings while we have been together.
My wife has asked me to move out of the marital home and back to my parents while we sort things our and separate.
I am worried what impact this would have on my rights to keep seeing my family, how it would be treated by the courts and what will happen to my ability to support myself financially after we divorce.
If anyone has any thoughts or advice or experiences they want to share it would be greatly appreciated.
NEVER MOVE OUT OF THE MARITAL HOME!
Never, never, never, unless that is you want to lose it, most of your estate,a fair proportion of your earnings from now on and contact with your children. This will be a difficult time for you I know, but don't move out. Re-arrange the bedrooms or sleep on the sofa, but do not move out, however tense things get at home.
I suspect some accusations of DV against you will be made (that often happens) and the police may be called a few times, but these are just tactics to make you move out (I'm guessing your house will be the prize asset in your estate) so make sure you remain whiter than white.
I wish you good fortune. This will be difficult, but whatever you do NEVER MOVE OUT OF THE MARITAL HOME!
Hello DuckSeason8192,
I echo othen's message to you in it's entirety.
NEVER MOVE OUT OF THE MARITAL HOME!
It is a totally unreasonable request for your wife to ask you to move out! If she wants a period of separation why doesn't she move out?
Why should you move away from your children and home comforts?
You need to look after your financial assets and remember you have a life to live after this is all settled and will need your rightful share of what is financially due to you to be able to do this.
It will be hard for you but be strong and stay where you are for you and your children's sake and to protect your financial interests. Ideally, if possible turn one of the bedrooms into a bedsit for yourself equipped with a television etc. If doing so will mean others in the house re-organizing their sleeping arrangement, so be it. Your wife could always sleep on the sofa. Women fought for Equal Rights and they succeeded, The pendulum has, in my opinion, swung beyond what is fair and reasonable and it is the turn of men to fight for their Equal Rights now.
If you can avoid it, it's better not to move out. I would certainly take some legal advice asap and try to start the process of sorting property, assets and children out asap. It's not easy to stay in the house together but you do need to be careful.
Hi There,
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As much as I agree that you shouldn't move out, I do think that some times you do need to, Things will become very tense and unless there is an agreememnt to live together then your children will feel the back lash of you staying.
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I would get some legal advice before you do anything, there may be a way of having a solicitor write up an agreement between you and your wife as to what happens, if you can get an agreement written and signed that means you have a way forward and a set amount of assets from the home as well as a schedule to see your children, moving out may be the better option all round.
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I understand why the others are saying never move out, but by staying you could be making everyones lives harder and in the long run making the divorce a lot more difficult as well.
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As said take some legal advice and explore your options.
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GTTS
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