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Hello all
I've had no contact with my children since March and have been corresponding with my ex via solicitors since August.
Mediation didn't go ahead so my solicitor received the C100 in which I've filled out with him last week.
I return to him on Monday to pay and send off the form.
My ex has been erratic and made allegations against me which have no substance. She got social services onto me following us splitting up. There was an investigation but it was closed, I was told by the assessor that she felt there was no reason why I shouldn't have contact with my children and that I should take this to court..... being my only option anyway.
Most recently I received a letter which my son wrote stating that he does not wish to see me. This was sent via my exes solicitor and my own solicitor was very surprised to have this passed on by a fellow solicitor. My son is 9 and the language within does not reflect that of a 9 year old......which points at alienation. My solicitor feels that this would be looked down on within a court, even more so if it was found by having someone speak to him, that it was influenced by someone- which is obvious. His name was at the bottom but with her surname, which is something a child of that age wouldn't just do
I've been in a mixed frame of mind lately as to what to do in terms of how I represent myself. The obvious issue with using a solicitor is costs, as your all aware that the costs are crippling, more so if it drags on past the norm of three hearings.
Some would say cost is irrelevant as gaining contact is more important, but it does worry me that I could end up in trouble with money. Having a solicitor present through out would be good but I may struggle to afford it.
Part of me feels so determined to see this through without having to pay an extortionate amount for something that's a basic right, and part of me feels that I am more than capable. But.... I do feel anxious also, and that when it comes to it my emotions may get in the way etc - I'm just pulling myself to bits debating with myself!
I just wondered what others thoughts are on the subject?
Thanks
Jonathan
Go it alone mate and don't lose you cool ever it has to be treated like a military operation from start to finish do your research and you will be fine, I loved it and learned so much it actually made me a better person 🙂
I think the first hearing is completely doable and you can gauge how you are coping once you've had that experience. You can do a bit of both, take care of much of the paperwork and use a solicitor sparingly or just diy until the final hearing and then appoint a direct access barrister.
Alternatively you could think about using a McKenzie Friend, they are a fraction of the cost of solicitors, can advise and support you and attend court with you, they just can't speak for you in court. As they are unregulated it's better to seek recommendations, if you are interested just drop one of the moderators a PM with your location and we may be able to point you in the right direction.
There are some videos in the stickys at the top of the legal eagle section, they might give you a flavour of what to expect.
All the best
Thanks for your reply, you've gave me a boost which I need 🙂
Thanks Mojo, I feel a lot better after your reply
I'm unable to send private messages, perhaps as I'm on my mobile? Unless I've missed something
Well I'm in the Norfolk area, and I'm almost sure that the court will be in Norwich. I'm in a bit of a arkward position as I stay at my parents in Lincolnshire at the weekends, and I work in Fakenham, Norfolk during the week. I use a solicitor in Fakenham as it's convenient being close to work.
I haven't wanted to commit myself to the area I work with me not seeing my children- and I have no roots in the area really apart from a couple of friends.
I would be most grateful if you could point me in the right direction in regards to a Mackenzie friend
Thanks
Jonathan
If you click on the username of the person you want to PM it will take you to their profile and under their name and login details on the left hand side you should see "send a message" click on that and it will take you to the messaging area.
If you want an MF it's probably better to find one in the area near to the court, otherwise you would need to pay travel expenses. I'll look into it and get back to you.
Thanks again Mojo. I have looked online previously but I wouldn't know who would be ideal as these are unregulated. I don't know anyone in the area who could recommend one.
I did think about going to the court and seeing if they have any information? They may also have some guidance on self litigation
HI There,
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I think as already said, representing yourself is possible, you do have some issues thatw ould need to be addressed, but from those issues you have also had SS stating that there is no reason you shouldn't see your child, so that will go a long way, I would look into MF's but honestly going to court alone isn't as bad as you would think, I did it as many others have on here and although daunting when you are there in the middle of it, you just get on with it and the nerves go, you know you are in the right and that will help settle you.
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The judges are now used to self representing and make allowences for you not knowing everything, as long as you keep calm and don't get into any arguements in the court room, you will be fine. If you arrive early you can ask any questions you have when you check in they are there to help you.
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GTTS
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