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It was a big surprise for me but Cafcass S7 basically just completely sided with my ex-wife, they acted like I was in the dock and she was the credible witness for the prosecution. Not much I said against her, even investigated, and a lot of the report was just allegations dictated by her, barely connected with the children. I was hoping for them to sweep away her complaints as rare and relatively minor, but apparently that isn't a thing, all someone has to do is seize the children and make a bunch of allegations and they're golden.
I have detailed the strange things she thinks are abuse. I used to see kids quite a bit, I won't be too specific as don't want to identify the case to anyone looking. After she stopped them coming it dropped to when she would bring them round, and now we've stopped doing that too. The S7 report seems incredibly biased, so many things missing. The judge did not entertain any alternative to just doing what the report said, no matter what argument, so I am stuck in contact centres. There is no final hearing booked in, they are just kicking the can down the road so it will be a long long time. They will assess the contact centre report to see if I'm a reformed character -- but then they want to leave all the decisions up to my ex-wife? So what was the point taking her to court ? I could have just asked her nicely to stop in the first place?
Cafcass will tell you to voice your disagreements in court, but judges can't legally go against Cafcass just because you voice your disagreement even if you can document failings, aiui. Is there seriously no complaints procedure to get a Cafcass officer replaced?
Mostly I'm worried that even at the end of many thousands of pounds and many months or years, when this process completes, the outcome is only going to be that after another 5 months, my ex-wife may just feel like trumping up some more concerns, make an emergency order and seize them again. It doesn't seem to take much -- though again I don't want to go into detail.
If I don't get them any nights, I'll not get a place for them to stay coming out of the divorce, so I'll never be able to change it.
If nothing else please pray for me and my children. This is not a zero-sum game.
hi. sorry to hear you have been having a tough experience with courts, and Cafcass. I hope the contact centre visits are not a permanent arrangement. You could make the case for these visits to progress to unsupervised, ideally at your house. I am assuming they would want contact to be built up gradually over a period of months.
Contact centres are usually only seen as a temporary measure, possible supervised to begin with, and if all goes well moving to supported (which means you may be able to take the children away from the centre for a couple of hours) and eventually then moving away from the contact centre entirely.
Hey,
I will be getting my section 7 done soon, can I ask the following.
1. Did you say anything bad about the ex?
2. do you wish you Should of stated how bad your ex is?
3. Did they ask any questions about your ex?
4. do you have examples or kept a list of the questions they had asked?
I want to know if being child focus is really the way or actually telling them how physco and manipulative your ex is. is the best way forward
being child focused is definitely better than bad-mouthing the ex. it seems hostility between parents is the 1st thing they look out for, as that usually affects the kids. they will ask you to answer to some allegations from ex.
more info:
https://www.cafcass.gov.uk/grown-ups/parents-and-carers/divorce-and-separation/section-7-report/
Hey,
I will be getting my section 7 done soon, can I ask the following.
1. Did you say anything bad about the ex?
2. do you wish you Should of stated how bad your ex is?
3. Did they ask any questions about your ex?
4. do you have examples or kept a list of the questions they had asked?
I want to know if being child focus is really the way or actually telling them how physco and manipulative your ex is. is the best way forward
Trust me, if you have a good judge and your ex is being vindictive and making harsh statements about you, they will see her for what she is. They handle cases like this every day and clearly see patterns and can read between the lines.
Whilst a good judge may/will see that, it will highlight conflict between parents, therefore Co parenting even on simple matters like handovers will be difficult to manage and thus the balance of the order will favour the resident parent.
All judges however, look to try and be child focused (although I'm sure we can all disagree on whether they do) and therefore being child focused is more likely to lead to a better outcome in relation to contact. That's not saying not to pull up the ex for issues but it has to be done in a proportionate/strategic way that increases chances of success. Eg highlighting safe guarding issues vs poor parental choices to avoid things being [censored] for tat..
Just my thoughts.
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