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hi guys, been on here a while
so my current court order is since sept 17. i varied the original in aug 17 as it went from every weekend to alternate but mum wouldnt give any holidays in exchange so had to apply to get it in writing. Child lives with mum, now aged 7. enforcement in jan 17. SPIP course done. mum agreed to fully and wholly comply but has since breached court order 20+ times. almost every 5/6 weeks since aug 2018.
he was burnt in may 16 at age of 2 with an iron. quite bad on his palm, social didnt bother to investigate. police saw no criminal aspect to it and refered to social but they fobbed it off saying as police didnt see a concern, they didnt need to.
various other injuries noted and reported to nspcc who made a referal in jan 17. sandwell said they were rough and tumble. they spoke to nursery who said he was ok. the same nursery that didnt see the next burn 6 months later
he got burnt again with an iron, i took him hospital and this prompted section 47. he was placed on child protection plan sept 17 to july 18. mums account was he plugged it in whilst she was in bath and climbed on his trike and tried to iron. they believed it. it was under category of emotional harm. work was done with mum.a) teach her not to leave a hot iron on near a child. and iron when hes asleep or at nursery b) a communication diary was impletemented for parents even though we communicate via text. the section 47 revealed that medical attention was not sought for at least 3 days by mum although it was later as he was with me the weekend and non for the second burn. The diary phased out of 2 months as mother wouldnt write in it or not bring it to handovers. as he wasnt burnt in that time CPP case closed. he used to cry and not want to return to mum but i was told it was normal, even would pickup on the route etc even if not going somewhere else he would break down in tears.
during the child protection plan he was crying on the way to nursery once and as the location of meeting was nursery..he told me his aunty had smacked him in face. social worker took notice.
i had to make a complaint about the section 47 report as it was not factually accurate, the social worker didnt follow procedure etc. i have a written apolofy off them,
March 19 he had another burn on right forearm. i took a photo but it was almost healed up due to gap in contact i couldnt see how sever it was so i didnt report it. and i was told to excercise discretion when reporting.
since 2018 then i have noticed his behaviour was odd. if he spilt something he would burst into tears. dropped something accidentally start crying . like he was scared of being hit . i re assured him etc and asked why he was upset but wouldnt say.
eventually he opened up in dec 2020 stating his mum pulls his ears, mainly when teaching him to read the quran. saying if he gets it wrong , she gives him 2 mins to practise the word and if he gets it wrong again she starts pulling his ears/twisting them. he states they feel like they are going to come off and burn. he also stated she regularly smacks his face, smacks back of neck and back of his head whenever she loses her temper.
i discussed this with nspcc and they made a referal to sandwell social services in Jan 2021. The social worker called mum, told her about referal, she denied it and said i love my son i would never hurt him. she stopped wednesday contact as a result. then when i saw him the following weekend he was very upset, starting crying "saying why did u tell them" why did u tell them" . i told him if i dont tell anyone..it will get worse and he needs to tell me if it happens or he can tell the teachers.
march 2021 he had redness on his hear where it had clearly been twisted . i photographed it, but he wouldnt say it was his mum (too scared from consequences). i reported it to nspcc. they made a referal again. This time social worker just took her time. spoke to mum, she denied it saying it happened in a park. she asked my son whilst at mums if he was ok (of course he wont disclose abuse at the place hes being abused) he said yes. i was told school would do some work with him.
April 30th he messaged me via gaming app stating shed hit him again and pulled ears. i called 101 and text social worker . she said "she would speak to mum" as i was at work. police didnt do a welfare check. but came to speak to house. he gave a formal statement and i was told to keep him in my care. a week later social worker rang saying police had no evidence to prosecute and it was decided to do some work with mum around chastisement. he remained in my care from 7th may to 25th
i asked them to put it in writing that despite the history, despite the disclosure they felt it safe to return him without putting measures in place. she refused to do that so i kept him in my care. made an urgent/emergency appliation to court submitted on 14th still awaiting court date.
mum went and collected him from school 25th, school facilitated it to be done 45 mins early. when i asked they said social worker authorised it. social worker said i spoke to your son and he said he didnt want to go to mum but she came and took him as she sought legal advice and denied authorising it.
She didnt send him to school next day and has now deleted his account on the app where he messaged me about abuse, i have screen shots still. he messaged me the day he got collected saying i didnt want to go , mum dragged me and head teacher forced me to go with her. mum has now told social worker she wont be allowing any contact as advised be her solicitor..which is bull sh2t as there is no reason for them to instruct her to breach order.
awaiting court date.
need some advice as to how to proceed next please
Unfortunately it looks like you are going to have to enforce order , but also stop raising allegations. Theres a long history of them and social services and nspcc are doing absolutely nothing or even backing you. If your son is generally being badly treated seems like you may have to try and increase your time with him every other weekend and some midweek and wait until he decides enough is enough himself . Maybe you could do your own diary with photos and evidence and keep them until the day social services do decide to act. Also even the school are supporting mum so you facing an uphill battle or perhaps if theres a court order they had no choice , but to let mum take your son 45 mins early. The last bit was probably advised by a solicitor if she/he had site of court order in place
hi,
I think the way court/cafcasss operates, they won't consider ear pulling as a significant safeguarding concern. They might be interested to know whether the child is being forced to take religious lessons and then being punished in this way. I know that behavior is not tolerated at all in state schools. I think you should use the court hearing as opportunity to gain more time with your child. You do have a great arrangement already. You could ask for 50/50 arrangement and see how it goes.
you could also ask court to consider a change of residency, if she breaches in future.
I think you're best to let the court deal with it all, apply for the enforcement and present your safeguarding concerns. If the court considers it necessary, they are likely to order either a Section 7 or Section 37 & could also give consideration to appointing a guardian to represent your child during the proceedings.
If you have significant evidence of breaches and risk of harm to your son, you should refer to this in your initial position statement for the first hearing. The ps should also lay out what you are asking the court to do.
Any allegations of physical or emotional harm towards the child should be taken seriously by a court.
Best of luck.
Hiya. Fingers crossed you can get this hearing early. Make sure you have your evidence to hand in case the court would like to see it but don't attach to the PS.
There's a link here that you might find helpful;
https://childlawadvice.org.uk/information-pages/writing-a-position-statement/
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