[Solved] Sacked second legal team- advice please

Wow you have had it tough mate. If you don't mind me asking how did you end up losing your business to her.

I mean how can she end up with everything and you nothing at all?

Ami, I have to be careful what I say online, but lets just say she convinced those that worked for us, that I had done some really nasty stuff, and then closed shop. Most of the staff moved on taking the clients who they were working with, and some of our equipment. The majority of the equipment, everything that was bought and paid for, she "gifted" to an employee of ours who she was EXTREMELY good friends with. He opened a rival business with our customers, and our equipment, and she later joined him bring the rest of the clients along. We ran a service related business, and were booked solid in advance. Every booking was secured by a deposit of £100-£200 and we had around £125 k of advance bookings 🙁

Any advice on the other stuff 🙂

Wow, that is nasty.

There must be laws against this sort of thing. Have you taken legal advice in this. Not a family lawyer.

I don't feel qualified to advise in the other matters, but this is my thinking:

Ignore what she does or not do when you go in court. It will backfire on you, i am sure.

If the situation has changed I think you might apply to vary the previous order. I think it is reasonable proposal to take care of the child if you can, and if the judge thinks there are no safeguarding issues. But I think it is illegal to be paid for childcare I think unless you are qualified.dont even mention it.

So I would concentrate on showing the child is safe with you and you are capable of taking care of him, emotionally and practically.

Sort out your income and housing in parallel. If necessary take advise on your business being stolen. You never know. That in the long run will help your case with contact.

:boohoo: So I am in court in less than a week. Its a review (we are in high court) and they are supposed to be setting a date for final hearing. Have been existing on £40.00 per week benefits for 6 months as ex took everything, closed business and reopened with our stock, clients etc, so there will be a lengthy hearing around that as she is currently earning £150 per hour in a business that we started together, earning nothing. I recently took a job earning about £300 per week. She spends that on childminders, so my question is, if I issues divorce papers and start ancillary relief proceedings, can I ask that the childminding be transferred to me, and that she pay me what she would have paid the childminder?

I'm doubtful that they would to be honest, they would probably consider that if you are available to perform childminding duties, this would be as part of a parenting role, rather than a service you could charge for. They're more likely to look at you joint business enterprise and want to decide on a financial settlement in that area, but I'm no expert on the divorce side of separation I'm afraid.

Can I ask for an order or directions to be made by the judge without submitting a form?

If this concerns a Child Arrangements Order you can ask and there's no reason not to, but you may be directed to submit a C2 form to ask for it. You could use a Position Statement to make requests to the court, which you can take with you to the hearing

Can I ask for amendments of an existing order in light of new evidence, as its out of time to appeal?

How do I do this. Can I just say "My Lord I would ask that based on XYZ you grant an order allowing/denying ......"

If you're referring to a CAO and there are further hearings, any orders already in place will be interim orders and can be amended/added to as the case progresses. You can ask verbally, or prepare a brief position statement to take with you to the hearing. You can't attach evidence to a position statement, but you can refer to it and state that you have it with you if the court wishes to have sight of it. If you wanted to file evidence with the courtyou would need to ask for permission to do so,you can do this by emailing the court, making sure you include your case number in the email.

Also, I want my ex to have a full mental health assessment as she has refused to have her records released and there are a number of big questions that while highlighted by social services initially, have been discredited by her GP. What is a sure fire way to force a full forensic psychiatrist assessment for a range of personality disorders that affect parenting, for both of us. I have no problem with the tests, but my files show a history of drug usage and depression, and while that was 20 years ago, in light of no evidence of her mental state, it is a blow to my case?

I think you're on a hiding to nothing here, if her GP has discredited it, thats likely to be enough for the court, and if Social Services aren't going with it then you would have a hard job getting it on he courts agenda, you're more likely to make yourself look bad... but this is just my opinion. .

Also, she told her GP after she made (proven false allegations of DV) that this was a factor, which she quite blatantly put in her report as the reason for my wife's mental state, without referring to her lengthy history of illness. But again, as the medical files were not released how do I fight her GPs letter.

al, you can do is to politely request that her medical records be asked for, but I refer you back to my previous answer.

I want to tackle as much of the damaging stuff and have it put aside before the final hearing, and i really want to set my stall out, and show that this is not going to be easy. She has destroyed my life, left me with nothing, and will not stop, so I need to show that I have had enough and am prepared to take any test and ho to0 any length to prove my worthiness.

The best way to get your points across is through a good statement of case, have you been asked to provided a statement? You could also request a Finding of Fact hearing, it's not a given that it would be allowed though and if a FoF was ordered, there's no guarantee that it would be found in your favour, but it would give you the opportunity to get your side of things out in the court domain.

I got the papers from the old solicitor/barrister, and I use social media, previously it was a huge part of my work, and what friends remain, are around the world. Every single post I have made over a six months period has been copied. Everything. If I post something about buddhism and meditation she seems to feel its directed at her. If I post uplifting quotes by Gandhi or Winston Churchill, she thinks its a did. There are hundreds of screenshots. Its CREEPY to think she is probably sitting behind a computer somewhere just waiting to stalk me. Can I highlight to the judge how intimidating it feels to know she is doing this, and have him direct her to grow the f*uck up?

This can be mentioned if it's causing you such distress

I just want to clear all her ammunition pre trial date and expose he as much as possible beforehand.

Fucker sits on her phone laughing and giggling with her mates, and as soon as the legal guys come in she acts like a little lamb, while her mates have been on Facebook telling the world i am a wife beater and a child abuser, and that I bankrupt the business. She has made my life [censored], and I want to sweep as much of her [censored] away before final hearing as I know her barrister is going to try and wear me down .

HELP PLEASE EVERYONE 😮 8) ;;)

This will be a big day. I had already asked to mind my infant daughter during the day, and to collect the others from school and help with their homework, do dinner etc, and I want to walk away having that but being able to afford it as well 🙂

I completely understand your distress, but you must try and maintain a calm and reasonable manner at all times, don't let her get to you and try and concentrate on putting your best case forward, it's not really about discrediting your ex, as this can often be interpreted as vexatious behaviour. Just concentrate on the facts and any evidence you have that can prove your position, most of what you've said above is about your ex, concentrate instead on your children and what is best for them, it will work better for you.

As far as the financial side of things, I'm not experienced in this area of and don't feel able to advise you on it. Hopefully someone will be along that can share their experience and knowhow on this part of your case..

All the best

Thanks everyone. I feel so stupid. The social worker asked that I hand over my medical records, or they would have the court do so. I have been perhaps far to open and honest through the whole process.

She has lied, and been proven to do so to the police, social services etc, and handed over nothing. My GP and her GP work together, mine went right through my medical history from childhood, hers mentioned nothing of tests, ongoing issues, and basically just backed up my wife's lies, with no facts. She made statements like "her depression and emotional issues were dues to the behaviour of her controlling and abusive husband". However if she had even the slightest evidence that this was the case she has not mentioned it.

I totally feel screwed over by social services, who go into great detail about my past some 20 years ago, but do not question the fact that my wife went to such extreme measures as to have me arrested, and yet the whole incident was on cctv showing that i was the one caring for my children and my wife did nothing. That CCTV footage in itself shows her to not give a dam, yet the arrest, being held overnight, and my total honesty has been used against me.

My wife lies about everything, and has some HUGE emotional issues. Its been suggested she is a psychopath, but because she will not release the files relating to years of mental health intervention and care, she walks away with a smile ?

I feel for you. I have had similar issues (though no near as bad) with Ex.

The thing with women in general is that they tend to be very skilled in this sort of thing. They have done it all their lives. They just go to everybody and anybody and play the sympathy card.

Men just sit and wait for the facts to prove themselves.

The family courts from what I have experienced are not interested in facts. It takes too much effort and time for them. They just go with whoever they feel most sorry for.

Oh if you do get a barrister, get a female one. From my experience the male ones tend to be too nice, rational, and courts are very much female oriented.

I have no further advice other than above, just sympathy.it is shambles really. In my opinion the family courts standard of proof should be changed to beyond reasonable doubt.

Been thinking hard about this, as this is a review hearing, Just read an email from a psychologist who worked for the Met Police. I am going to ask the judge that, based on the imbalance of evidence provided, and given that we have both made some pretty serious allegations about each other, he have a forensic psychiatrist and psychologist undertake a full psychological assessment relating to cognitive, emotional and psychological functioning.

I will ask that they test for Cognitive Functioning, perform a Personality Assessment Make an assessment relating to parental Parental Stress. There are other tests to measure ‘fake ability’, resilience, emotional coping, attachment etc

I will ask that they consider whether there are any psychological therapies or treatments which would address any risks/issues identified.

They will then have access to her medical records, which is only fair as they have mine.

I am also going to file for divorce this week, and submit an application for ancillary relief. And ask the judge to grant interim payments. I have all of our accounts up until January of last year, and I have all of the communications via email and facebook, detailsing all of our staff, bookings, payments, how much we charge and how far in advance we were booked etc.

This is not simply a matter of wanting to win, but rather wanting what is best for my children, and if the tests show any issues, and they can be resolved, then why would a parent not want to take this opportunity for growth?

I would question why the SW chose to look so far back into your medical history and not at all into your ex's, and suggest that it's therefore not a fair analysis.

Of course it's your decision to request expert asssessments, but don't be surprised if the request is denied.

Sorry I can't be more helpful.

Something I learned in my own and other cases is that pushing for something that is unlikely to happen diverts your time and energy from things you can change.

The psych assessment is not going to happen is it? All you have waiting for you there is stress and disappointment when it is denied. It will be argued that you are obsessed with attacking the mother on a personal level.

The thing most people never seem to grasp is that this is not a "fair and reasonable" arena. This is why your open and honest approach has got you nowhere. I would not suggest becoming secretive or dishonest but you do need to manage your expectations. Good deeds count for nothing here, so don't expect them to help you in any way.

Focus on the welfare checklist. This is what the court will be doing.

Well said Justdad.

Don't go in there expecting to get justice.
Familly courts don't do justice and they certainly are not interested in what is fair.

Vent your frustration here.

When you go there, just go with the flow. Follow the path of least resistance.