[Solved] rights to see a baby?

From what you've said, it sounds like you are not on the birth certificate, though correct me if i'm wrong.

Without being on it, you currently have no rights whatsoever & if mum says no to access then unless you go to court then there's nothing you can do.
If it turns out you are baby's dad you can go to court & get parental responsibility & also access visits. However with baby being so young, it would be limited access to start with as they are very relient on mum at this stage.

As far as I know I'm not on the birth certificAte! So the only way to get this sorted is to go to court?

Ok cheers, also is ther anyway I'd be able to contact her social worker n talk to her? Problem is I have none of her details :/ it annoys me how women can just change so suddenly!

Cheers for your advice il try my best. It's so wrong that dads have so much trouble just coz the mother is hard work and selfish. Thanks

Well it seems its just got more complicated and irritating! The mother has contacted me and now says she has had a dna test done via her doctor and that the other guy is the dad! I dont believe this one bit so where do i go from here now? Solicitors? Courts? Help much apreciated ith this, getting very stressed.

I'm not sure whether a court would order a DNA test (could well be wrong though) - when you look at it from the court's point of view, the mother is claiming that the child is not yours, and you aren't on the the birth certificate - the question is what grounds do they have to order the test?

they should do it on the grounds that , myself and the child has a right to know the truth. she said it was mine tho and now is being very distant and angry towards me and saying its not mine. they cant just take her word 4 it without proof. i have a right to know the truth.

Actually Actd, you're wrong.

Yes, he can go to the courts, present his case and the judge can give him a DNA via court order. Its almost unheard of that a judge will deny this. I think the father has to pay for it though via a court ordered doctor. If she deny's in court that baby is his & it turns out that baby is his, she will look very bad in front of judge.

Even with a DNA test he would then have to be added to the birth certificate (if he isn't already) and would then have to apply for visitation or partial custody through the courts. A judge usually sides with the mother in cases like these and so at most he'll get visitation rights to see her supervised and eventually may get access on weekends & the holidays etc.

Just because he's proven to be the biological father and would be on her birth certificate doesn't mean she has to automatically give access, thats a different case altogether. She can hold it off for as long as it takes you both to go to court and state your cases & depending on her, as we all know, she could drag it out for ages.

thanks for clearing that up james. Does anyone know how i start the court proceedings ?

Hi
First you need to find out if the baby is yours, I write to the mother by registered post , I would give her 14 days to reply and say you will be taking court action ,I would ask for proof from the baby’s mother, that she has actually done this DNA if she is telling you the truth then she will have no problem giving you this if she says no then I would be very suspicious,
Do you know the other Father who is now supposedly the Dad, can you find out if in fact he did a Dna, for him to have done a DNA he would have had to have swabs taken or blood test this would have taken at least 10 days. Is she with this man? As she decided he is the better option, financially, as if you are the Father you will be expected to pay maintenance for the next 20 years!
You can’t just apply to the court for a dna paternity testing you have to do this alongside another court action, say for example parental responsibility and a contact order, I would do all three as its cheaper, it will cost you £200 the forms you need are a c100 for contact

Application under the Children Act 1989 for a residence, contact, prohibited steps, specific issue section 8 order or to vary (PDF 370KB

And a parental responsibility c001-eng.pdf (PDF 273KB)

Paternity tests which are required to stand as evidence in court will have to be carried out following specific court directions, which will name a specific accredited company to carry out the tests and to provide a report. Samples will be taken by healthcare professionals who will send them to the testing company. Court-directed paternity test
If a paternity test is required for legal reasons, the court will require the samples to be taken under strict conditions by a test provider accredited by the Ministry of Justice.

If the person with parental responsibility refuses consent for a child to be tested but the court considers the test is in the child’s best interests, the court may order the test to go ahead. A direction can also be sought from the court if the man or mother refuses consent for a paternity test.
Send your completed forms to the nearest magistrate’s court where the child’s mother lives it will take about a week to 10 days to get a letter with a court date which should be about 6 weeks. At the top of the legal section there are some stickys that will guide you through the form filling

The ‘unofficial’ (non-court-directed) tests, even with samples taken by doctors, will be cheaper but do not stand as evidence unless the court agrees to allow them.
So even if she has had them done the court may well order more, unfortunatly you will have to pay and this can cost £150 to £350

In 2007/8 almost one in five paternity claims handled by the CSA ended up showing the woman had deliberately or inadvertently misidentified the father. Without a challenge these 661 children would have grown up believing the wrong man to have been their ‘dad’ and these 661 men, over the child’s lifetime, would have paid perhaps £50 million pounds in child support and stood the chance of impoverishing their real families and subjecting them to unnecessary emotional strains

hi thanks thats a great help. ive tried to contact her but get no replys at all through any means. ive asked for proof that the dna has been done and all i got was told me to go away ( but not in the nicest of ways. mailing her would be pointless as i know i wouldnt get a reply, i do know who the other man is but due to thier history and his past, ( hese a drug user, or was and violent and a criminal ) so due to these reasons there is no way id contact him. he is no way financially better off. this is why im so confused over why shes saying its now his? maybe he has threatend her.

Hi
It may well be she is just saying that he is the father so you leave her alone and she wants the child to herself. Every child has the right to know who their father is. Try the registered letter , try to get her to go to mediation, try all this at the same time as submitting the court forms then when you go to court they will see you are serious and have tried , keep proof of everything, texts , log phone calls write a diary. You need to know if the child is yours as you will always wonder. But even if he is yours you will have a long battle with her as she sounds like she will control every move. The forum will support you in your quest , but also be prepared for a long battle and the fact he may not be yours.

Actually Actd, you're wrong.

Yes, he can go to the courts, present his case and the judge can give him a DNA via court order. Its almost unheard of that a judge will deny this. I think the father has to pay for it though via a court ordered doctor. If she deny's in court that baby is his & it turns out that baby is his, she will look very bad in front of judge.

Even with a DNA test he would then have to be added to the birth certificate (if he isn't already) and would then have to apply for visitation or partial custody through the courts. A judge usually sides with the mother in cases like these and so at most he'll get visitation rights to see her supervised and eventually may get access on weekends & the holidays etc.

Just because he's proven to be the biological father and would be on her birth certificate doesn't mean she has to automatically give access, thats a different case altogether. She can hold it off for as long as it takes you both to go to court and state your cases & depending on her, as we all know, she could drag it out for ages.

Fair enough James 🙂

My point of view is that what is to stop anyone telling my wife that he is the father of her children, and demanding a DNA test? Would she really have to go to court and do a DNA test purely on the word of someone who makes a false claim? That's why I was making the assumption that there would have to be something more concrete to force a DNA test.

ACTD- its not as if im making a false claim to be the dad, she has told me through messages and face to face that the baby is mine, that should be enough evidence for me to get a court dna test.

Hi I think you have enough evidence. Have you started filling in the forms yet

Hi gezc

To some extent, I'm playing devil's advocate here - the face to face probably doesn't count for too much unless there's a witness. However text or email messages will be much better to support your application.

Thanks guys.....actd I didn't mean to talk down or anything, & AK57 has far more info than me, but I only know this because I will be facing the same situation myself, my pregnant ex has disappeared & so having researched, it suggests I have to apply to court for a DNA test, to even start the ball rolling on PR if she denys the child is mine. What i've read also says that its almost unheard of for a judge to deny one to someone who wants to be a father. In fairness though my ex did tell me that the baby was mine when she was first PG, so I suspect that helps. Obviously, that might be whats different if your wife was pg & some random bloke came along! 🙂

so what forms do i need and where can i get hold of them??

www.justice.gov.uk/forms/hmcts

you will need the c100

Cheers, i have seen the form and im not sure about he very first part, do i already have permission to make the application or do i need to apply or permission?

Thanks guys.....actd I didn't mean to talk down or anything, & AK57 has far more info than me, but I only know this because I will be facing the same situation myself, my pregnant ex has disappeared & so having researched, it suggests I have to apply to court for a DNA test, to even start the ball rolling on PR if she denys the child is mine. What i've read also says that its almost unheard of for a judge to deny one to someone who wants to be a father. In fairness though my ex did tell me that the baby was mine when she was first PG, so I suspect that helps. Obviously, that might be whats different if your wife was pg & some random bloke came along! 🙂

Don't worry, I didn't take it as you talking down - your post was quite correct 🙂

Cheers, i have seen the form and im not sure about he very first part, do i already have permission to make the application or do i need to apply or permission?

Hi you dont need to apply for permission as you are the childs parent

But i dont know if i am the babys father, a dna test has never been done with me:/

I think you will need to fill in form C2 which is the form to ask permission to apply. You would then submit C2 and C100 forms to the court. If you go to www.justice.gov.uk you can download the forms from there, or alternatively pick the forms up from the Court. You should get the booklet CB1 with the C100 form and that offers guidance about how to fill out the forms.

Hey its been a long time since i was last here so iv come back with an update with whats been going on! Finally had a dna test done a few weeks ago and i am the childs biological father 🙂 that was great news for me:) although its not all good news, while ive been waiting for thjngs to happen and all this to be sorted my son was taken from the mum and put into care:( i wasnt aware of this until the other week! Really dissapointed, angry and upset about this! Now i have to go to court for the care proceedings and everything else! Im annoyed i have a son who i cant even see yet:( ! Anyway thats whats going on some good news some awful:( not sure what happens from here but il soon find out! Cheers all:)

Glad you updated us - I would hope that you could get residence for him.

Im not sure whats going to happen, got a meeting with solicitor next week so hopefully find out what my options abd things are, but as far as im aware my son is with a foster family atm who might get the possibility to adopt him! Really dont want that to happen 🙁 doed anyone know if theres anything i can do to prevent that? Cheers all

I believe you do have that option, but I don't know how it's done. Hopefully, your solicitor should advise you on this, but may be worth having a word with children's services - I would hope that they would tell you how the system works.

Yeah im sure it will all come clearer to me when i see the solicitor next week, i just wish i was able to see my son but as he is in care thats not going to happen yet i guess:/

It's harsh mate I never seen my 11 month year old daughter for nearly 10 months I have been in some very dark places during that time but I can assure you, you will get to see your son, It dawned on me a couple of months ago that the courts will move heaven and earth for a father to see his child as it is the law at the end of the day every child has the right to have BOTH parents in their lives and the courts stick to that like glue, I'm not sure how it works due to your son been in Foster care but now that you are proven to be the father I'm sure the courts will push for contact so don't lose hope mate 🙂

Cheers for that very reasuring:) i have seen him before, held him when he was a baby and saw him earlyer this year, but didnt know he was actually mine then so couldnt realy make a connection with him, if you know what i mean. Just want him to know who is dad is and that i care about and love him even though ive had very little to do with him so far thru no fault of my own. It is very hard knowing he is in care right now when he should be with his family

I simply can't imagine what you must be going through mate but at least you know he is safe and being well cared for it would be 10X worse if he was living in terrible conditions and suffering abuse ect, All what you are doing now to start the fight for him is all you can do to show him you are there for him and when he's older he will find this out and thank you for it trust me, you can't do anymore so concentrate on the fight to be part of his life, I really struggled with missing my daughter and her sister it's been absolute torture not being there for them especially my step daughter but I had to channel them emotions into fight and it's paid dividends so try and focus on the outcome and do everything you can to get there, use this site to it's full potential as you will get some awesome advice for every step of the way 🙂

Yeah i will fight with everything i have, could never give up on my son! I have so may emotions thoughts and feelings right now its a nightmare! Along with all this my current gf who i been with 2 years is pregnant aswell so thats on my mind too, just hope i have a good solicitor who can help me and guide md through all of this! A positive note is that at least i didnt end up on jeremy kyle haha however long i have to wait to see my boy it will be worth it in the end:)

That's the spirit! 🙂 ooooohh another baby on the way, exciting! 🙂 Yeah man your head must be battered I didn't know my [censored] from my elbow when my ex suddenly stopped contact it was the worst time of my life I had no where to turn and I couldn't find any help anywhere with regards to how I go about getting contact it was [censored] then I found this site it honestly saved my life what with having no family, friends or a girlfriend around me this is the only place I had for help and advice and everyone on here has been fantastic so don't be afraid to go it alone and self represent if a solicitor doesn't fit the bill I went to see three and they all completely freaked me out the cost was just ridiculous! At least you have your Girlfriend by your side that is a very big plus point for sure.

My story is defo worth a jezza show for sure but I feel like I'm already on one when I go to each session of the parenting course I go on ordered by the court I'm sure all the people on my course have been rejected from that show lol