[Solved] Parental Responsibility Advice

Hi There,
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It must have been awful to hear these things from the schools rather than already knowing, I am not as experienced on these sorts of issues, and I'm sure others will be able to give you better advice, I don't know if you can enforce your ex to tell you what's going on, and I fear that you would only get a watered down story anyway.
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At least you have the school on side and hopefully they will keep you up to date with any issues, it could be worth discussing with the head and the teachers if they would be happy for you to email them maybe every other week for up dates, they could then alert you to any issues you aren't aware of.
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GTTS

It might be worth having a word with Chidren's Services as your daughter's wellbeing in many respects is nt being catered for. Technically, as you have PR, you are legally responsible for ensuring she attends school, even though you don't actually have control over that.

Thanks for the advice so far, much appreciated.

I have in the past approached children's services regarding various issues and my ex wife's clear and blatant refusal to recognise our children's best interests.

Sadly as is always the case I was met with a brick wall.

I had a long chat with head of year at school relating to attendance. They have written to my ex relating to attendance and had no response from her. I have insisted that they write to me also in future so I will at least be aware and try to intervene.

I am truely at a loss what to do next

I'd try children's services again, and also speak to the headmaster about what he is able to do to escalate the issue - after all, if he knows htat you will support him, then it's not a waste of his time.
If you get nowhere with Childrens Services, then try the family rights group - www.frg.org.uk

Hi there

I've read through your previous posts....you've been on a very painful journey, you must be exhausted, no wonder you had a meltdown!

I think you have a couple of options; you can write to your ex and let her know in no uncertain terms that regardless of the status quo you love your children and are shocked and angered that you had to find out from the schools that your children have serious medical issues and big problems with school attendance.

Point out that although contact has broken down, you are still entitled to be kept informed about issues concerning their health and education and request that she provide you with information about your eldests impending operation, your youngest injury and reasons why school attendance is so poor. Remind her that it is her duty as the resident parent to make sure that the children attend school, as it is in their best interests to do so, and anything less is in fact a dereliction of her duty.

Parental responsibility doesn't afford many rights but it does state that whether you see your children or not, you are entitled to be kept informed of medical, educational and religious issues and be kept updated on their general progress.

Keep it civil; it's gone way past friendliness at this point, and inform her that you can reapply for enforcement, and a specific issue orderto be kept informed of educational/medical issues in future. Make it clear to her that if she continues to ignore these basic parental rights and refuses to keep you informed, you will not hesitate to take this course of action.

You could ask her to agree to mediation.... She can only say no

I'm so sorry you and your children had such poor service from the courts and other agencies, they should recognise Parental Alienation as child abuse in my opinion, perhaps if they took a more stringent stance, we wouldn't see so many children used and abused in this way. I have no doubt that if your daughters are struggling it is in no small part because their mother has manipulated them emotionally and psychologically for so long. I only hope that they will find the strength to come looking for you when the are able.

I'm not sure Social Services would help, they only step in where there are serious sageguarding issues and as you've tried in the past with no success, I can't see that changing.

All the best

Hi

I agree with Mojo about writing to the mother on these issues and that CS are likely to be unhelpful, however, I would still speak to them so that at least it gets logged with them. You can, as Mojo says, apply to enforce being kept informed of PR matters.

Many thanks for all the advice. I am humbled by your willingness to advise and support guys like me who ultimately only want what is right for their children.

I have approached the solicitor I used prior to me self representing and I am awaiting a response from her in relation as to what to do next.

I am happy to apply to the courts to seek an enforcement relating to PR but in reality what will this mean? At the end of the day if my ex wife chooses not to tell me things I need to know about then I have no way of knowing I am not being told if you know what I mean.

All her family have severed all ties with me and my ex has severed all ties with me and all my family. We live 50 miles apart and the only link I have to my kids is attending school parents evenings and functions. Admittedly this is how I have discovered the latest revelations but how mamy things do I not know about?

We have had 3 separate goes at mediation that have never got beyond the first session as she is totally unwilling to compromise with the mediator stating more than once that it is 'difficult' trying to achieve anything when she turns up with her mother and our children in tow! All this because she feels vulnerable and thinks that the children have a right o be involved in all aspects of the matter!

Again thanks for the support.