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Hi,
I haven't seen my daughter now for fourteen months. I have been trying to arrange contact for the last five. The mother has said that I can't see her. In the past, she has said that she would get my daughter to say things about me if I went to court. I am devastated. I don't understand how I can live in a society where this can happen, where mine and my daughter's basic human rights are so flagrantly violated and where it seems that I have absolutely no recourse and the mother can say and do whatever she pleases. I have been fighting on many levels for many years now and I am truly exhausted.
On top of this I have had to deal with MS for the last ten years. Being out of work for the last five. Being depressed, for obvious reasons. What is my plan of action now? I cannot go to court a s she said that she would coach my daughter and get her to say things about me. And why do we have to go to court to see out children? Why don't w e have equal access rights? Why is the law so unbalanced?
Has anybody out there got any ideas? Can we not march? Can we not change the law? Why do we take this [censored]? If it was the other way round and mothers were being treated like this. There would be uproar. I need justice. I need to see my child. I have had to put up with this [censored] for ten and a half years now.
Thanks,
Adrian
Hi Adrian
I'm sorry you are having such difficulty....my opinion is that you should ignore her threats and apply to the court for contact, the longer you leave it the harder it gets, and can it be any worse than it is now...you have no contact and without attempting court, no way of getting it back.
Best of luck
Hi There,
.
As Mojo has said, i would ignore the threats, and start the process asap, if you have any evidence of your ex's threats then that would help your case, but even if you don't, you still have rights.
.
As much as many feel the courts are geared towards mothers, and in some extent they are still in some cases, the way things are handled now has changed and father rights are taken seriously.
.
even if your ex does coach your daughter, cafcass are likely to be involved and they may even talk with your daughter and will hopefully get to the bottom of the coaching.
.
We can support and advise you through out so any questions just ask, but get the ball rolling
GTTS
Hi,
Thanks for your responses. I will probably go to court in the New Year. At least to get a PR. I'm basically trying to protect my daughter from her mother. She is basically a Sociopath and a very dangerous person indeed. She is also very intelligent, manipulative and extremely controlling. It is very vexing and exhausting indeed.
Thanks,
Adrian
Thanks. I appreciate that. I will do.
you will find it so much easier and less exhausting if you had a contact order saying when you can see your daughter the norm as they get older esp around 6 is full weekends and a day in the week,ignor the threats enjoy time with your daughter and keep all the expensive gifts you have at your house ,stash of money if you have to go to extremes
be aggressive apply for mediation so you can get fm1 to put with a c100 arrangments order ,best advice start being robotic ,everything procedure step by step!
Yup draw a line in the sand and get to court ASAP first up sort mediation quick sharp dont bother just going for PR in the real world it means Jack and does't mean you have a right to spend time with your child once mediation fails get straight in there for a child arrangement order.
I bit the bullet and done the same to put an end to pandering to my ex's complete * * all the time it was hard as [censored] and I didn't see my baby for 10 months but now I'm so pleased I did I have my girl all the time on my own terms and I can just be a Dad without my ex making my life a misery.
Don't wait until Jan get on it tomorrow.
All the best
Slim 🙂
Hi
Agree with all of the above - get the ball rolling on mediation asap as this is a mandatory requirement before making the application. Legal Aid is still available for mediation so if you're out of work, you should qualify.
Once you've gone through that process, you can apply to court using a C100 for a Child Arrangements Order. Also get a form EX160a as that should help you be exempt from the court fees.
Try joining a Families Need Fathers group in your area where you can get face to face support with all of this.
Good luck
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