Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hi I am currently living a real life nightmare, on fri 6th jul I woke up to a letter of my now ex partner saying she has left me and took my kids to a safe house 2 biological and 1 not in the letter she left me she says that social services told her this was the only way to leave me for the sake of the kids emotions, so first thing Monday morning I went to social services and they told me there was no file open and they could not help so I went to the police station an put a missing persons report in the. have the police call me within half an hour saying my ex partner and children are safe and that’s all they could say so on the Wednesday I get a non molestation without notice order served upon me with a court date set for the 18th jul, I was intending on going to court and objecting to the order as the statement she had put in against me is an absolute farce however I got mixed up with the days and missed it, in her statement against me she says things like I am financially controlling, I make sure all the benefits are paid in to my account, I don’t allow her to control any of the money I don’t let her pay bills , I don’t let her work I don’t let her go out I don’t allow her to have friends she also said I got physical with her on 2 occasions and also says that when she try’s to leave me I always convince her to reconcile with me, however every point she makes about me I can prove otherwise, firstly I have the last 5 years worth of hmrc housing benefit letters etc all confirming that benefits are paid directly in to her account , I also have every single txt message and Facebook messasge throughout our whole 5 years together were there is numerous messages of me asking my ex partner what I should do with money an who I should pay basically she was in charge of finances and I have over 700 bank transfers from my account to her account every time I get a biggish amount of money in to my account it’s transferred to her, and how she said i convince her to get back with me I have messages of me splitting up with her, she says she couldn’t work or go out I have lots of messages regarding picking her up from work also her telling me she’s going out and also asking me if she can go out and I clearly say yes of course u can there isn’t one controlling or emotionally abusive message from me to her she has been to Ibiza twice and Italy a month ago and I have all the messages to prove that also, does a controlling emotionally abusive partner allow the gf to go on holiday no, the evidence I have against her is damning and I can literally prove everything is a lie, citizens advice are useless and I don’t qualify for legal aid apparently as it’s not exceptional circumstances ie the kids arnt in care, I have spoken with a solicitor but they will not even send a letter to her solicitors seeing if she will mediate with them over contact with the kids unless I pay them 4K witch I havnt got, she has been put in. Safeguarding house for mother’s and children when she does not need to be in three women out there that are I break danger from people and need places like these my ex partner has made up a load of lies about me in order to get set up in a new place and have everything handed to her On a plate she is really abusing the system, and as I say I have all the eveidencevti prove her statemnt a pack of lies, I want to know if I can appeal the non molestation order and if so how do I do it? How long do u get to appeal? Or should I approach her solicitors and explain to them I have all the evidence I need to prove her statemnt wrong, however If she is happy to agree to contact with my children I will leave it at that and allow the non molestation order and not expose her to be the lying manipulative evil person she is any help is greatly appreciated as nowhere and no one seems to want to help me unless I have thousands of pounds ya give them thanks in advance
I'm not sure about the appeal process for the NMO - some of the other members might be able to help you with that. Alternatively there's a group called the PSU (personal support unit) who work alongside the courts and may be able to help. There are also other organisations called Family Rights Group, Childlawadvice, etc who may be able to give you limited help.
As many of the other fathers on this site have discovered, mothers are making false allegations about fathers in order to get custody (now called residency) of their children and the benefits that come with it. What you're going through is just the start - make sure you keep and obtain as much evidence as you possibly can. Follow up every lead you can - reports from police, social services, schools, etc - you never know what you may discover that will be evidence in your case.
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.