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Hi, has anyone actually submitted a non molestation order against their ex?
Me and my ex still live in the same house as she won't try sort the living arrangements out.
We're not married and house in my sole name.
Have a court order in place now for our son whilst still living together and for when eventually live apart.
There's been a few incidents on her part of verbal abuse against me, in front of our 3 year old son and her 10 year old daughter, swearing, slamming doors etc. I voice record all incidents.
The last couple of weeks she's been saying that she's going to get me out of the house by whatever means, Occupation Order?
If she keeps up with the verbal abuse could I apply for a NMO against her?
I'd say that if you find the abuse is escalating, trying to appease is not going to work, and what often happens in these cases is that the abuser then pretends to be a victim because as a woman she is more likely to be believed, and at that point you're deeper in the poo hole.
Consider talking to The Men's Advice Line on 0808 801 0327 ( http://www.mensadviceline.org.uk/ ). Also organisations like https://www.dadsunltd.org.uk/ are working hard on putting a voice on male victims of domestic abuse and may have good advise.
Domestice Abuse can be imparted by women as well as men....women however are more likely to be taken seriously than men (in my experience)
If she were to report it to the police they would be out like a shot and you'd be warned or worse!
You reporting it to the Police would need the officer to take you seriously and not fobb you off like the one that i saw when i went to report the escalating abusive threats etc... that my ex was making to me in front of our child.
i bascially got told that if i was to ask for it to be recorded they would have to go speak with the ex and that would likely make things even worse than they were for me having to live in the same house...i was then told (off the record) that what could then happen with contact disputes etc...etc... ...i was then asked if i was prepared to put myself and my child through that and i was advised to go home and think about it and if i still felt the same come back and they'll record it and go speak with her.
i went home...decided not to do anything as i didn't want to lose contact with my child....i'd read up about contact orders etc... and saw some real horror stories and didn't want that to happen to me and my child
fast forward a couple of weeks and what do you know...the very next argument it came out that i'd been to seek advice from the police and told her that she was being abusive and could be arrested...she went balistic at that.....10mins later the police were at the door due to a report of a domestic with a woman in hysterics. yep...my ex phoned them saying i wouldn't leave the house and she wanted me out and i wouldn't leave and had been threatening her.
funily enough after about an hour she calmed down...she told the police she didn't want me to go now and i could stay and so the police left (i had a verbal warning from them despite it being her threatening me!)
she then turned to me and said (somehtign along the lines of)...refuse to do what i say again and i'll have you locked up because all i need to do is cry and have a red mark on my face and you're history!
So.....yes it will will likely escalate things so speak with a solicitor to get the facts about what you can do to remain in the house!
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