[Solved] Need some advice with access to my daughter

Oh it did break me 2 or 3 times and I was about to top myself at one point, I'm never going to that place again trust me, I've been through some [censored] in my time but nothing compared to that nightmare.

It's not over yet this is only the start of contact for 3 months we are back in court in 5 weeks for a review hearing, I fully expect my ex to drop some more bomb shells sooner or later I'm just better prepared to deal with them now.

Yeah my ex stopped me from attending the scans ignored me through the whole pregnancy, I found out the [censored] of my child through facebook she barred me from the birth I found out 3 days later, I didnt get to see my girl for the first 6 weeks of her life I 've only seen my daughter for 4 weeks out of her life she is one in a few weeks, unreal man.

I got my ex back in court to make her play ball if she carries on messing about it will just put more nails in her coffin I have played the courts cool as a cucumber throughout and she is finally on the back foot and everything is going in my favour I think she may finally be seeing the light she was half reasonable yesterday but I'm not holding my breath.

Well from my exp, dont hold your breath. At the risk of sounding sexist, i am going to be off women for quite some time. Just me and my daughter thats all i want.

After my and my ex split. (in short) she wanted me to move back to Corfu to live with some of my family, a few weeks later she wated to change my daughters name then all this started with access. Now that instantly tells me she is trying to shut me out of my daughters life over time, how else would you see that behaviour.

Just me and my daughter, its not too much to ask... its all i want.

Hey Chimp, I can't really add much to the advice you've been given, I think it's correct, mediation really is the way forward. My partner jumped through ever increasing hoops with his ex, bit like you was expected to have a certain amount of contact in her home and lots of other annoying requests. Think she was petrified of losing control. My partner has recently had his final hearing after 3 years of an emotional rollercoaster, he only wishes he had started the process sooner as his child is now 5.

As for the playing up, this is normal 3 year old antics. There's a lot to be said for 'familiarity breeding contempt', my partner's child never plays up for us but does for the mum, my 2 used to be total angels for their Dad and I used to get all the rubbish stuff, unfortunately that's just how it usually happens. As my partner lives with my children and sees things from the other side, he tries to back the mum up, if their child has been naughty for mum he will speak to the child when they're with us. My ex never used to back me up which was really tricky, until 1 day he was on the receiving end of a tantrum and ever since then we try to present a united front, sometimes he plays good cop to my bad cop and vice versa 🙂

Because you've managed to agree overnight access between you, mediation just might work for you guys.

Good luck with it all 🙂

Than you 1626,

I always tell my monkey when im tucking her in bed at my ex's house to make sure she dosent wake up too early for mummy and that mummy talks to daddy if she is being naughty or throwing tantrums, which is rare. But My daughter seems to just push my ex to the limit. There really isn't a great deal else i can do. Every time my daughter is a my house i make sure she calls her mum but i never get it the other way round and yes i hope she comes to her senses but im sure mediation will be effective too. Hopefully it will show her that I am willing to take it further.

Have talked with my ex this morning letting her know that Leila was dropped off at nursery OK. but like i said, i never get it the other way round.

Thank you all

Frustrating isn't it. My partner says the same thing. Well done to you for putting your daughter first, she's lucky to have you fighting her corner. Perhaps if your ex will let you have more independent access with some extra overnights, she will get more of a break and be able to cope with the day to day better.

Fingers crossed mediation works for you, you're not asking for a lot and seem very sensible and child focused 🙂