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[Solved] Need help, not sure where to start!!

 
(@swiftman04)
Active Member Registered

Right Ive been having my kids ages 17/15/12/8/6 every other weekend at my house for the last 3 years.
My ex has been with her partner (now married) for 3 years. I have been with my partner since January this year.
I could no longer afford my house so I sold it in the summer and moved back to my parents (100 miles away) and the area where my partner is also.
I last had my kids in the summer holidays for a week at my parents and this was the last time I saw them. As my ex hasnt liked whom i am with from the start and my house is gone she has now stopped me having them over the weekend. As im 2 1/2 hours away its not a simple task of going to see them obv.
My ex has a short fuse and becomes verbally abusive over the phone and in person so I refuse to speak to her over the phone. She has on 1 occassion attacked me in the street outside her house also. I have messaged her and stated that any correspodance between us should be over txt so everything is documented and not missunderstood. I have messaged to have the kids on my weekends and she has stated NO as she doesnt want the kids to see or be involved with my partner at all (its out of spite - me and my partner are not addicts or criminals we both work and she has a child from a previous!! ) however its perfectly fine for her partner to be involved them the last 3 years. Me and my partner are looking to get a place together very soon so when I finally have the kids they would be there with her anyways. All my ex wants to do is use the kids as weapons to make things difficult.
What I basically want is to have my kids every other weekend as I have done for the last 3 years, pick them up on a Friday after work and take them back on a Sunday evening. I dont want to have to see or speak to my ex at all as the hatred I have for her for doing this is overpowering. I still speak to my 2 eldest kids as they have mobiles and they have told me they are all missing me however as ive explained to them its not my doing, i want them as normal but it is their mum stopping it.

How do I start the ball rolling with going to court to get my weekends with the kids back! Never had to do this before so have no idea where to start!

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 26/09/2017 4:46 pm
(@got-the-tshirt)
Famed Member Registered

Hi There,
.
You would have to start with attempting mediation, which is now required before the case can be put before a judge, if mediation fails or your ex won't attend then they will sign the C100 court forms and you can then apply to court.
.
Your case isn't unusual it's something we see a lot, when you start to move on with your life the mother starts to dig her heals in and cause trouble.
.
GTTS

ReplyQuote
Posted : 27/09/2017 8:47 am
 Yoda
(@yoda)
Famed Member

Hi

as gtts says, you would have to start with mediation although if you're living so far apart, it's likely you will only have to attend one meeting with mediation.

In terms of a court decision, unless the mother agrees once you reach court, it's possible a court would refuse to order your children to undertake that amount of travel every other weekend, even if you are prepared to facilitate it. It might be worth thinking of alternate schedules you could propose if it gets as far as court. For example, that they come to you once each half term and you visit them once each half term and then they come to visit you each school holiday.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 27/09/2017 11:00 am
(@swiftman04)
Active Member Registered

Ok, ill see how to start things with Mediation then as like I said im not too sure where to start!

My ex has a child with someone else and he had to take her to court 2 years ago to get his weekends back. Funnily enough he lives about 10 mins from me and travels every other weekend to pick him up etc so the court was fine then in regards to travelling so hopefully would be with me too!

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 27/09/2017 12:46 pm
 Yoda
(@yoda)
Famed Member

You can find a mediator here;

http://www.nfm.org.uk/

It really will be up to the individual judge to decide, if they can't get you to reach agreement.

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Posted : 27/09/2017 9:16 pm
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