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Hi,
I have a bit of a situation this coming weekend which could end up ruining months of planning; i'll try to keep this as clear and easy as possible.
We have a child arrangements order for my daughter. I currently have an active Enforcement application for breach and an application to vary the existing order due to continuous ongoing issues with the mother; basically her rules or no-ones even though there is an Order.
The Order stipulates that my daughter's contact with us is to commence the first weekend after she returns to school however, the Mother decided to ignore this and instead has made her available a week later.
We use the Order to plan our lives and with this we booked for our wedding to fall on a weekend where we knew we would have our daughter; so now because the contact is out of sync, the Mother believes that there is nothing in the Order to say she should make our daughter available for my wedding weekend, even though my daughter knows all about it, is excited at being a bridesmaid and has a dress all ready to go. There is also a condition in the Order where our daughter is to be made available for family occasions; it really is that clear.
On top of that, the stepfather has threatened that if we do not make our daughter available for her dance class on the day following the wedding that she would not be attending the wedding at all. I have tried to explain that we have made contact with the person who runs the dance school and they have given us authorisation for our daughter to miss one class, given the occasion; reason being is because we wont get back home until about 1am and she would need to be up again at 7am in order to then get ready for a 3hr dance class. The wedding day will be long and busy, and I don't want our daughter not to be able to rest properly.
Is there anything anyone can suggest I can do about this? Its getting ridiculous and the mother and stepfather just ignore the order saying it doesn't say anything but, its very clear and it does cover both start of contact after the summer holidays and contact when there is a family occasion.
Any help is gratefully appreciated. My heart will be broken if my daughter is purposely not at school to collect on Friday, and I can see this happening.
Many Thanks,
Bluesky10.
I really don't know what I would do in your situation... if you already have an open enforcement order/application maybe you could send an email marked as urgent but I doubt anything could be done for this weekend but if you cc'd mother in the email would that deter her actions or would she just continue to ignore?
I would maybe get a letter from the dance organisation to show authorisation for your daughter not to attend, although this may not have an impact with you ex, attaching it to the email might help your case if they do refuse contact (and I really hope it doesn't get to that)
Last thing you could do is speak to the school show/send a copy of the order and explain that it is your weekend / wedding and that you are the person that should be collecting your daughter this Friday. In court my partner was told that as he has parental responsibility he should give a copy of the order to the school - don't really know why to be honest.
Again I really don't know if any of those actions will resolve your situation and I really hope the mother realises that she is not only taking a special day away from you but from your daughter.
Hopefully others here will be able to know what's best to do.
All the best
Hi there
You are very time limited here, with an ongoing enforcement case, I would suggest you go into the court and speak to the court office, explain the urgency and ask if you can be seen by a judge immediately.
It might be that they'll ask you to submit a C2 form to apply for an emergency Specific Issue Order within existing proceedings, going into the court personally will hopefully push it through in time.
Other than that, you could go along with them, but just don't take your daughter to the dance class, if it's in the order already then you aren't breaching it.
Best of luck
Thank you for all the advice and kind words.
I have spoken to the court today and asked if I would be able to attend and speak to a judge given the circumstances. I have been assured they will do all they can to accommodate this if I attend prior to the Judge's daily schedules commencing and I may get in.
In the meantime we haven't had any reply from the mother and stepfather after 48hrs, so I can only assume they wish to ignore our request for confirmation of whether we will see our daughter or not this weekend; I guess i'm left with no other choice but to hope and pray that I get to speak to a Judge and explain my issue, and that they will make a sensible judgment to include an Order I can serve on them via e-mail or special delivery.
Thank you for all the advice and kind words.
I have spoken to the court today and asked if I would be able to attend and speak to a judge given the circumstances. I have been assured they will do all they can to accommodate this if I attend prior to the Judge's daily schedules commencing and I may get in.
In the meantime we haven't had any reply from the mother and stepfather after 48hrs, so I can only assume they wish to ignore our request for confirmation of whether we will see our daughter or not this weekend; I guess i'm left with no other choice but to hope and pray that I get to speak to a Judge and explain my issue, and that they will make a sensible judgment to include an Order I can serve on them via e-mail or special delivery.
From your reply above, it certainly seems like you would have been forced to see a judge to get it sorted, hopefully that has happened and you're on track for your wedding.
You're probably too busy to respond. With preparations in full swing, so I'd just like t wish you and your wife to be all the very best for yourfuture, have a wonderful day!
Mojo
Hello all; an update.
So after a reply from the stepfather a day before I was due to collect my daughter from school, I took a risk and she was indeed at school so we collected her as expected. We had a wonderful weekend and mother and stepfather of course were not happy that my daughter enjoyed it.
Now to tackle the school......my emails concerning where our daughter should go next to school have gone unanswered. My daughter is being brainwashed where her mother thinks she should go; i.e. the furthest school away she can find from us the better. They're not even in the catchment area! The mother doesn't like the fact I am suggesting a school in our village even though it has an excellent rating and reputation; she wouldn't feel like she's in control!
Hi there
That’s great news! Thank goodness it all worked out for you and your daughter.
The issue with the school choice isn’t easily solved if she is refusing to discuss options with you. Your next step would be to try mediation to sort it out, but if that failed, an application to court for a Specific Issue Order is the only other option.
All the best
Great to know that you have your daughter for wedding your day! Congrats
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