Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hi people,
Ive just received a visit from a court officer who has served me with court papers for my ex requesting a non-mol order.
It is full of lies and contradictions with no evidence to back anything up.
The court date is for Monday via Teams. I’m self representing, what should I expect? How can I show my evidence? Will this order most likely get grated with no evidence?
hi,
try to remain calm. here is some great advice on how to deal with these:
How to deal with Non-Molestation Orders in Family Court
@bill337 Agree with you 100% the same thing happened to me and a few more it seems!
The link that you sent https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kc09do6nr4c says it all really.
@bill337
Thanks.
it says on the letter “there is little evidence to support the assertions if notified that the applicant will be at risk of harm or will be dissuaded from pursuing the application.”
At the hearing you can say that you do not agree with the allegations. The Judge may try to persuade you to accept undertakings which is a promise to the court not to do certain things. Or the Judge may make the order for the time being saying 'there is no finding of fact' and set a date for a hearing when you can put your side across. Is there something else going on such as child contact? If not and you don't need any contact with her, then its probably easier to accept undertakings and move on.
I have experience in this, if you would like to have a chat over the phone I can guide you in the right way. PM me.
I have been through the same. As others have said, just keep calm during the hearing. Do you have children with your ex too and what is the arrangement with that?
You may suggest just accepting an undertaking which is simply a promise you will not contact your ex in anyway and not threaten her etc. There will be no non mol placed on you but if you break the conditions you can be punished for it. As much as I wanted to contest mine, I just accepted in the end but on a non admissions basis and with no fact or findings made against me. It was very tame report anyway, even the ex's solicitor said that and the judge. If you contest it, you will probably have to wait months for this hearing, by that time, you could have served most of the non mol anyway. I know its frustrating, but ask any questions if you need to,
@champagne Thanks. There is also a contact issue, I am in the process in starting a court order for contact and for a parental responsibilities order
@fer17 We have a child together, she is only 6 months old and I haven't seen her since she was 10 days old, she has completely stopped myself and my family from seeing our child. I raised concerns with the social services and now out of revenge she has tried putting this order on me and has said in the report that she is also applying for an injunction? The thing that breaks my heart the most is that there is a little child in the middle of all of this. There is no evidence of abuse, just a father wanting to have contact with his child.
Also, as I am taking time off work, can I claim this from her? This is loss of earnings due to no fault of my own?
Will I have to pay if this goes to a hearing and fact finding?
Will I have to pay if this goes to a hearing and fact finding?
No you won't.
I'm going to give a different opinion to those above. I contested the non-molestation application my ex made against me and was successful.
You could accept undertakings but if the mother is the kind of person to fabricate etc there's nothing stopping her from claiming you've harassed her/ broken the order when you collect your kids. Then you'll have even more headaches to deal with.
I'm not the kind of person to take the easy/less hassle route. For me personally, the allegations made against me were false and there was no way I was ever going to not say so based on principle. I think more dad's on this forum should fight back then mother's may be more reluctant to try it on. Atm they all seem to advocate lying down and taking it. Fck that.
@cofeeman I'm going to deny all the allegations and refuse the undertakings, I think that a non molestation order is an extreme measure for something that is clearly a contact issue between both parents.
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.