[Solved] Is this reality...

H there

I've removed the link, I think it's better for your own anonymity, if you don't post things that can identify you, as you have an ongoing court case.

You will have to attend the hearing, it's very important that you do. Unfortunately, unless the court considers the children are at serious and immediate risk, they won't act as quickly as an applicant might want. Generally it can take up to 8 weeks for the first hearing, so you're application is being considered more quickly than some.

I understand your worry, but hopefully you will hear from the police today, if you don't, perhaps you can give them a call to chase it up.

You can also keep in touch with the SS that are dealing with this too and ask them to keep you updated of any developments. It's a tough time for you, stay strong.

All the best

Will it be difficult to self rep in a prohibited steps and contact hearing? Will there be any defence? I'm of quite a nervous disposition. The legal costs are spiralling, I got £4,000 ear marked for a barrister in final occupation hearing for my stab in the dark for justice.

Still no call from the police, I'll chase them up tomorrow if I hear nothing before. I've washed my hands with SS they never bother to get back in contact, being bent over by their single assentment where I wasn't given a fair say, even when I made a complaint pointing out obvious errors, they didn't update it. They even wrote a view from the [censored] offender in there! I feel like I will never see my children again, Im devoid of any pleasure without my family just suffering

It’s a civil court, so is more informal than a criminal court. As she is in a refuge it’s likely that she will be eligible for legal aid to pay for a solicitor, so she will be defended.

Self representing is doable and we have many members that have done so with much success. There’s no way of predicting outcomes and it could be take longer to reach a final hearing, as the court will want to investigate any allegations that are made.

We will do all we can to advise and support you.

All the best

Self repping is very doable but you will need to work hard to keep your emotions at bay.

Right now you need to be gathering documentary evidence of everything you can - Facebook, texts, emails and any bills etc. Some won't be of use but you almost need a complete reference library of your life together so you can pluck out evidence when needed.

I saw your headline about "is this reality" the other day - you can bet your life it is and as much as you still "love" her, you need to be strong for your children and put up the fight of your life here.

As Mojo says, we are here to help. Many of us have been in your shoes - I remember the police cells and the rape allegation....not nice BUT it's all just a moment in time that passes.

Thanks guys

She's left the refgue and occupied my house about 3 weeks ago. Found out today my housing benefit will stop but still must pay the rent to my council house since I dont want to roll over and give up my home after waiting years for it. Fast track to bankruptcy here I come.

Because she applying for a domestic abuse visa she can't currently get legal aid while home office investigate her claim. She's due to get her visa in September if they approve it, which they probably will as it seems ridiculously easy (see article) She got a solicitor funded by charities at the moment.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3379500/Migrants-cheating-pretending-victims-domestic-abuse-stay-Britain-permanently.html

It will be interesting if she puts up a defence to the prohibited steps order against her 4 time convicted [censored] offender other man.

Police said they will post the result of Sarah's law application tomorrow.

I have strong evidence against the majority of her claims, for example claiming I didn't allow her access to joint bank account yet have bank statements showing her taking literally 100s out every month. Some lies impossible to prove however saying I punched the wall and scared the children, if only walls could talk.

I dont know how time can help, I already had a rough life full of abuse and neglect, the 3 years with my wife were the only time I ever felt truely happy, health improved incredibly. Doesn't help as well I was punching above my weight having a head turning wife. Maybe she was a blue pill illusion but she gave me two wonderful son's. I miss them terribly 8 weeks now.
Sometimes I just feel like taking the gamble and try to talk her out of it, must be feelings deep down somewhere... I know it's madness and I wont, my brain feels like it's being torn in half.