[Solved] Interim contact order

Hi Colin, unfortunately Mediation is now mandatory before making a court application. If your ex refuses to attend, the Mediator will sign and stamp the C100 application form for you.

Self representing isn't as daunting as it seems, lots of Dads on here do. Have a look at the stickys at the top of the Legal Eagle section, there's some good advice to be had there.

You can also ring Corams Children's Legal Centre's free helpline for advise if you're not represented. Have a look at the Families Need Father's website too.

Just a thought, do you have Parental Responsibility for your step son?

I was wondering the same thing.

If you haven't adopted your step son then you will also be required to apply for Parental Responsibility and I think you will need to ask for permission to apply. So you would need forms C1 and C2 as well as the C100. The mediator should be able to advise you further about this.

Some solicitors offer a free initial consultation and this might be helpful to you.

Thanks, I don't have parental responsibility, stepsons father who is on birth certificate hates me and wife a vengeance, I met her year after they split up, he has it in his head I took them away from him, we never applied for PR for me because of problems he would have caused, hes never seen son since he was baby, never paid maintenance and we've never wanted it, never a birthday or Christmas card from him, ive brought stepson up for last 7 years so can apply for PR, the problem I have is when I put papers in, his dad has to be informed as he has PR, is that correct ?, if it is he could cause us huge problems and upset, he could and probably would say he wanted to have contact with son just to get at me and wife, Stepson doesn't know im not his Daddy, we were going to tell him later this year, whats that going to do to him if his real dad gets involved, its doing my head in trying to think what to do.

...unfortunately that's true and he will have to be informed once it becomes official.

As he hasn't had any contact with your son it doesn't follow that your application would allow this, if he wanted contact he would have to make a separate application in his own right. I shouldn't imagine the mother would just allow him contact so he would have an uphill struggle because he doesn't have any kind of relationship with the child.

I really feel for the little boy caught up in all of this, it looks like he's going to have to be told about his biological father. Perhaps the mothers reaction at the moment is because she is worried about the outcome if court is involved.

Might it be worth reasoning with her about coming to an informal agreement for contact, that way the bio father need not be informed and that would allow you and mum to choose the right time to tell him as you had planned. Perhaps it might be helpful to write to her, the most important thing at the moment is protecting that little boy from any more upset, he will be upset enough about the separation without having to be told about his biology. Once he has had time to adjust to the changes then you and your ex could talk to him about his bio father. These things need to be handled with care and sensitivity.

If she loves her child as I'm sure she does, she must see that denying him contact with the only father he knows will be causing him distress, and if she forces your hand by not trying to mediate then she is again not putting the little one first as court will inevitably lead to the other ex becoming involved...I feel for you all

Good luck

I'd try and avoid court at all costs if you want to try and get PR for your Step Son it is a massive uphill battle, I brought up my Step Daughter who's now 6 from Birth who's a little Disabled her Dad was actually hoping she would die as he didn't want a disabled baby he told me this on the way to the hospital when she was born, He has never bothered with her never been here for her never financially supported her nothing, all I applied for was a contact order to see her and he was informed my ex got in touch with him and fed him a right load of lies so he got made party to the proceedings to try and stop me from seeing her. They both said I was never involved in her life the courts and cafcass believed this and only awarded me 2 indirect contact's a year, My ex and her dad lied in court and said he was having regular contact with her now which is complete rubbish as he doesn't so the poor kid has no one it's heart breaking.

If your ex plays hard ball and gets the father involved you're in for one [censored] of a battle man If you can come up with an agreement without court try and do it.

Slim

Thanks for replies, your right in I need to try to come to an informal arrangement with my wife, ive written to her 3 times over last 2 weeks explaining that if it goes to court, son's real father will have to be informed, she has not reapplied to any of letters, I don't know were they are living but have an address I can send mail to, I know she has picked them up, a huge concern of mine is, if stepson's real father does want to be involved, I really believe my wife would do a runner and leave the country, she has family abroad particularly where they would never be found, I spoke to Coram about this, they said there is nothing I can do except keep trying to talk to wife, but that's only possible through letters I have no other means of contacting her.