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Sorry to jump right in as a brand new user with lots of questions but I could really do with some help on this matter and a friend pointed me in the direction of this forum so I am hoping you guys can give me some advice.
My friend had a fling with a girl in October of last year, in March he found out she was pregnant and due to the dates he was suspicious the baby might be his, he asked her and she denied it.
She claimed the baby was definitely her boyfriend's (she had a boyfriend at the time she and my friend slept together, split up with him shortly after and then seems to have got back together with him around the time she found out she was pregnant), she said she had spoken to various doctors and that it was impossible the baby was anything to do with my friend, she also said she was due on a date that made it less likely the baby was his.
Then the baby was born, coincidentally almost exactly 9 months after the event, my friend - who had been suspicious all along he was being lied to - was at this stage sure there was a good chance the baby was his, the girl continued to deny it, backed up by various ridiculous stories that she deems proof, and is bringing up the baby with her boyfriend.
My friend told her he wanted to have the baby DNA tested, she refused, he went to see a lawyer (through CAB) and threatened her with court, she caved, the baby was tested, the results came back, the baby is 99.9997% his child. The type of test they had done is admissible in court, the company was recommended by the children's hospital genetics department and was done by independent doctors privately, rather than just being a home test where you swab yourself. He paid extra to make sure the test was the right type to stand up in court and it cost him quite a bit of money to do so.
He wants to see the baby, be part of it's life and pay his side of things. She wants him to pretend none of it happened and leave her to raise the baby herself, with her current boyfriend. She seems to be trying to scare my friend off in the hope she can continue to keep it all secret and go on as she is currently raising the baby with her boyfriend.
What on earth does he do next? He's on a low income and can't afford a lawyer, he is just over the threshold for legal aid (I think, any information or confirmation about this would be seriously helpful) and he has no clue how to proceed. He is 100% determined that he wants to be a part of the child's life but it seems, at the moment, she is 100% determined to try and stop that.
A further issue is that on the baby's birth certificate the boyfriend is named as father, and the baby has the boyfriend's surname. My understanding is that the birth certificate will need to be changed to show my friend as father before he can legally be involved, I assume that needs to be done through the courts? I also assume that's the first thing that needs to be sorted before he can start trying to get access to the baby?
Does anyone have any clue how to proceed with this? Is legal aid is a possibility? What are my friend's rights regards access to the baby? Where do we look for information on all this, I assume there must be sites with more info on them, but which ones? Any information would be really greatly appreciated. My friend is going to see the CAB today but he's been there before and he's fairly certain they will just tell him he should speak to a lawyer, which he is worried he can't afford so any information or advice any of you can give would be really, really helpful.
If you made it this far, thank you! I look forward to hearing your advice.
Hi There,
I will ask the CCLC to drop by and give advice from a legal view.
I would say though from experience that as he can prove the child is his then he would need to go to court and firstly apply for PR (parental rosponsibility) and also a contact order so he is able to see the child.
I would imagine all this will be a very difficult proccess seeing as this girl has told her partner he is the father.
Darren
Thanks for your reply Darren, that was my basic understanding from what I have read on here and on other sites. I'll look into applying for PR and the Contact Order more. Obviously any legal advice would be great from anyone that can give it.
I'm not sure how the situation will change once the girl's partner knows he isn't that father, I am guessing if it all has to go through court he'll find out that way if not before.
I'm sure it will change hugely when this guy realises he isn't the father.
Just try and keep in mind though that this is all about the child and not the adults, the child has a right to see and build a relationship with the father, but should also be able to continue to have a good relationship with the step father (as long as he is still willing) I would suggest a ver softly softly approach to this and maybe even try to keep it out of court and allow an agreement to be made out of court for the birth cert to be changed and contact to happen.
This may save face for the step dad as it won't get draffed through court making things a lot more difficult to handle.
Darren
I definitely agree that if it could be arranged so that it was all handled out of court then it would be much better for everyone involved. My friend is trying to make contact through the mum and deal with things that way but we wanted to have all the necessary information in case she continued to try and keep him out of the baby's life.
Thanks for your replies, Darren.
Well the CCLC can take a day or 2 to reply so keep checking back and if you think of any other questions you have add them and they will respond if they are able.
Good luck and keep us posted
Darren
Dear Magpie
We would advise mediation in the first instance to try and resolve Parental Responsibility and any Contact issues that there may be. However, if mediation is not deemed suitable you may want to consider applying to the Courts for Parental Responsibility and Contact.
It is important that the non-biological father is removed from the birth certificate.
Parental Responsibility is defined in s.3(1) Children Act 1989 as being: "all the rights, duties, powers, responsibilities and authority which by law a parent of a child has in relation to the child and his property".
Practically Parental Responsibility means that both parties should consult and consent on issues such as schooling, medical issues, change of name, removal from the jurisdiction and other major issues concerning the child.
You can obtain Parental Responsibility by:
• You can negotiate with the mother to obtain Parental Responsibility through an agreement. This form is entitled a PRA1. The form requires both parties consent
• You can re-register the birth certificate. This again would require mother’s consent.
• If mother does not consent you can apply for a Parental Responsibility Order. The form required is a C1.
• You can apply for a Residence Order and will gain Parental Responsibility this way.
You can apply for a contact order by completing a C100 form.
All the forms mentioned can be obtained from either www.justice.gov.uk or from your local Family Proceedings Court. The application forms do require a fee.
Should you require any further advice please do not hesitate to contact us via our webchat facility which is available Monday to Friday 9am to 6pm and can be found at www.childrenslegalcentre.com.
Yours sincerely
CORAM CHILDREN’S LEGAL CENTRE
CCLC,
Thank you so much for the information, it's very useful. I will definitely have my friend look into mediation as that sounds like it would be the best thing to try initially, I really apprecaite you taking the time to reply.
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