[Solved] Hi......Any advice?

I don't believe it's within the remit of the CC to test for alcohol and how would they do it, get you to breathe into some kind of commercially available breathalyser!?

Costs is a grey area, lots of the dads end up paying it themselves, unless theres a court order stating differently.

There are two types of CC contact, supervised and supported. Supervised is where a support worker is assigned to you and your child exclusively, you would be separated from other families and written reports are made. Supported contact is still overseen by a support worker, but from a distance, no report is compiled and there are other families having contact at the same session.

If she is making all these demands, I can't see how you can move this forward without a court order.

All the best

Hi Mojo

Thanks for the response. Yes she is wanting one of these commercially available testers - the kind you get off Amazon or eBay - so technically not really worth much! Even the contact center are like "eeeeeerm" when I quizzed them about it.

I am happy to pay for the costs myself as long as I get access - I can afford it but the fact that shes making demand after demand, at some point it has to stop.

In the last short while (couple of hours) she has AGREED that I can see her this Saturday - so thats one good thing.

Cheers

Invis

I shouldn't think, the CC would want to get involved in that to be honest. If they are part of the National Association of Child Contact Centres you could give them a call to find out more about this. Here's a link to their website where you'll find details of a telephone helpline you can call.

www.naccc.org.uk

Let's hope you can make progress with this.

All,

Just an update on my predicament - and any advice, is, as usual, extremely welcome - constructive or otherwise - we all have something we can bring to the table.

On Saturday I had two hours with my daughter (I did do the Breathalyzer test just so I could see her), supervised and verbally recorded (they recorded everything both of us said) at a contact center - I have to admit that those two hours were amazing, we played, had fun, smiled and laughed like we had never been apart, the worst part was when she was leaving and asked if I was coming home - I almost broke then - but I kept it together.

On Sunday I had my usual facetime with her, we laughed again, spoke about things - she told me mummy had made her sad yesterday and was down about it - but I managed to make her smile and we were back to normal in no time.

About an hour later, I get a text from my ex saying she had heard from a "little bird" that I had put a ring on my new GF's finger and that I had been dating her for two years whilst I was married, calling me a scumbag, etc - all totally untrue (there is NO WAY I will ever get married again!) - I KNOW who has told her this and will deal with that separately - but I explained to her that this wasnt the case and that whilst I had heard things about her - there was no way I would act or mention them as I am trying to keep this happy and respectful (from my side it is - not from her side), the conversation was short, but it basically ended up with her telling me that I wont be able to have supervised contact with her now.

I just feel that this is one step forward and ten steps back, I am not sure how much longer I can go on like this.

Any advice?

Invis

Have you attempted mediation or submitted the court application yet?

Hi Yoda,

She is "far too busy" to attend the Mediation (despite not working) and I have contacted another mediator today to get the C100 signed - I have had enough of all this.

Invis

We're here if you need support or advice on the process...in the meantime there are some really useful stickys at the top of the legal eagle section to help guide you through the process. We also have a new live webchat facility starting up on the 25th Jamuary where you can book a ten minute slot....our first webchat is covering legal issues, so if you have anything you'd like to ask follow the link at the top of the main page to register.

All the best

Thanks Mojo,

I have a meeting with a Mackenzie Friend tonight - and I am looking to have the C100 signed next week (its all down to costs at this time and as January is a 5 week month its a nightmare).

The Ex has started communicating with me again via Text (but only to tell me when I cant/can have FaceTime with the little one), but with regards to the Supervised Contact she has said nothing - I have noticed on other forums that if I have started to go to Supervised Contact at a Contact Center then this could go against me right away for residency visits (which is ideally what I am aiming for).

The ex wanted 4+ years of Supervised Visits but I have managed to get her down to 2+ - but to be honest I dont think its reasonable anymore so I feel the C100 may be the only option now open to me.

Invis