[Solved] help with order and schedule

Why would you not attend? If you’ve gone to the trouble of a court application, it’s important that you stick with it. Is that the final order?

It’s not about the mother, you knew she was difficult...it’s about seeing your children, they will be expecting you to be there after school, I don’t think it’s wise to let them down. You have ordered contact, she can’t dictate what you do during your time with your children, my advice is to rise above it. Surely not turning up is playing into her hands, and proves that you aren’t reliable and don’t put the children’s best interests first.

More generally, only the resident parent can breach an order, by not making the children available as per the order. A court can’t order the non resident parent to attend and there aren’t any penalties as such, but the resident parent can suspend contact and claim that the non attendance is distressing to the children.

hi mojo. thanks for advice. unfortunately it will be dictated. theres stuff in recital, like i will agree to take them swimming during the mid week contact. yes its final order. guess i wasnt strong enough during court. my barrister was pushy and i felt pressured into accepting things like school pick ups. i mentioned that this could become an issue at work. he said, i can change jobs then. its not that easy. will see how it goes. i also reluctantly agreed to school pick up on the friday afternoon which will be my full weekend with kids. just feel like kicking myself. my emotions seem all over the place. i mentioned to ex, can i pick up kids an hour after school finishes. she said if i do that then i will be seeing kids for 30 minutes.

i spoke to cafcass later about this. she said to stick with kids routine for now, and see if they can do anything else in few months time. i have feeling as soon as i want to decide to do something else for the kids, thats when ex will become more hostile, as she wants to decide whats done with kids. time will tell. recital was long list of ex's silly demands lol. it seems like she only allowed mid-week contact if its on her terms.

Recitals aren’t legally binding... they can also say things like parties to agree on extra time as and when, but that rarely happens!

It makes me angry when people are pressured into accepting unworkable conditions, your barrister should have argued your position. We sometimes forget that we pay them and they are paid to follow our instructions.

How long ago was the final order made? You can always return it to court for variation after a few months. Not ideal I know.

All,the best

hi mojo. final order only came out a week ago. i will see how things go for the rest of the year. i get the feeling the ex will try and arrange expensive after-school activities and expect me to go along with it. if i was to apply for a variation, that would be £215?

...yes that’s right.