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Hello everyone and thank you for taking the time to look into my post, so heres what i need help with.Sorry for the misinformation topic title wasn't sure what to put.
I went through court proceedings 4 years ago, due to an ex lying to me about my daughter not being my daughter, cut a long story short, she moved away over 200 miles away, i found out my daughter was my actual daughter when she was 5 months old due to court order, had visitation through contact center which then proceeded to visits to where i live over 250 miles away when my daughter was around 2.
At current i have an order in place which gives me a minimum of 50 days of contact a year where i live, everything despite the odd problems had been going smooth for 2 years.
Out of the blue my 3 just turned 4 year old daughter decided she doesn't want to visit me in my location, I have tried to arrange with my ex for my daughter to come visit but she says she won't let her come because she doesn;t want to, as a week went on, my ex has sent me voice mails of my daughter saying "your not my dad" and other quite vile things, i've asked where she has got it from? and my ex replies she doesn;t know. (Quite clearly shes putting things into my daughters head.) it is arranged that my ex tell me everything to do with school's, health and living arrangements, but i don't get any of this. I am allowed to visit but it costs me around 300 - 400£ to visit for 1 day of contact, which i cannot afford, also due to my recent health diagnosis i find it hard to travel, she has no blocked me so i have no way of contacting her, apart from through her current partner which at the most recent court hearing was told he was not to contact me due to threats etc, i pay CSA its not a lot but, each visit to where i live costs me over 250£ also if i am asked for new shoes, nappy's (past tense) new tv, buggy, i am always willing to send money to pay for it.
I am now stuck on what i should do, legal aid has been abolished for people like myself, so going back to court is something i'm really wanting to leave unless necessary.
if i could get some answers to these:
1. Quite clearly things have been put into my daughter's head, im quite worried that my ex is trying to turn my 4 year old daughter against me, which is disgusting, so im wondering is there someone i can contact in terms of "mental child abuse" as such? if thats the term.
2. I understand she has broken the order in terms of blocking me which in return is technically stopping contact? what would be the next step?
Right now all i want is to have my daughter where i live, so i can spend time with her, but i'm extremely stuck as she lives so far away there's not a lot i can influence or be apart of.
so any help would be appreciated!
Hi there
To answer your questions....
1. Unfortunately there isn't, emotional abuse would be practically impossible to prove. You could contact Social Services but to be honest I doubrt they would get involved and would more likely tell you to go back to court. If you apply to enforce the existing order the court will look at the reasons and you will get a chance to voice your concerns
2. You are correct, she is breaching the order if she is refusing to allow your daughter to visit with you. Unfortunately the only way to address this is to apply to court for enforcement. You could try writing to her and reminding her that she is in breach of the court order and that unless she provides you with a contact number and reinstates contact at your home you will have no alternative but to take it back to court.
As you are aware, Legal Aid is no longer available, but you don't need a solicitor to make an application, many dads here have self represented with success. At least you have had some experience of the family court so it shouldn't be as daunting.
If you decide to go it alone we are here to advise and support you as much as we can. You might also benefit from attending a Families Need Fatheres meeting in your area, here's a link to their website where you'll find details of meetings nationally
www.fnf.org.uk/help-and-support-2/ local-branch-meetings
Best of luck
Hi There,
.
As Mojo has said your ex is in breach of the current order and you best option if she won't respond to a letter is to apply to have the current order enforced, as already said you don't need a solicitor as you can represent yourself through out and we can help with advice and support.
.
Even if your daughter is saying that she doesn't want to see you, her mother has an obligation to encourage and make your daughter available at the times set out by court order. This is quite common and the courts are used to seeing it, so I would apply to the court to have the order enforced asap.
.
GTTS
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