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Hi all,
My ex partner stopped me seeing my children saying that I had previously hurt her and my children, for the record I did neither things. She claims that I hurt her over 7 years ago when we seperated. Since we split up I have had my kids stay with me every weekend.
The social workers got involved regarding her alligations and did a single assessment. The single assessment is incredibly biased and one sided, they have asked my ex many questions regarding our relationship that they did not ask me. They also have said things in the report I did not say.
However the outcome of the report does say that no further action is needed as I am currently in process of taking my ex to court to gain an access order.
One thing that concerns me in the report is that my child's headteacher writes a statement saying that my child said his mother has hurt him before and that she told my child she would need to report this to the social services. The does not appear on the timeline, so therefore it was never reported I feel. However, it is in the assessment so social care DO know about it.
I have contacted the person who did the report and was told they are no longer working on this team and to go to the manager. I go to the manager and they have completly ignored all my calls and emails for weeks now. What I do not understand is WHY have they not done anything about this incident the headteacher states? When against me they have jumped all over me, when against the mother they have literally said she has done nothing wrong. I have complained and asked for answers but nothing has happened. This is very biased and/or sexist!
I have been to court once for the initial hearing and the judge dismissed my exs claims of abuse and put in an intern contact order where I see my children for a few hours at a family members house a week whilst the social care again do a full investigation. I am now waiting on the final court date to know what will happen.
I am terrified because the social care seem so biased and against me when I have done nothing wrong but be a good loving dad for my childs entire life. When I did see the social worker she did ask me questions about how much I want to have them, would I be willing to be flexible in instances where my ex may need child on certain weekends due to family events etc. So this seemed like she was going along the lines of I will have proper overnight contact again. But I am just not sure at all.
Being completly honest I am totally destroyed. I do not know who to turn to. I am worried my ex is poisoning my child against me from stuff that is said. I have raised many concerns to social care and they ignore me. Then praise the mother like she is a saint when even report states wrong doing (which for the record is equal to what I am accused of).
I really dont know what to do or who to turn to.
hi,
please try to calm down. you have stated that at one point social services said they are no longer involved. thats a good thing. means theres no safety concerns regarding your child.
the social service/cafcass reports are not the most accurate, and are at times dopey. if I were you i would not make a big deal out of the headteacher and whatever he/she wrote. just focus on seeing your children. these other things are just silly distractions to divert your attention away from whats most important.
the fact that your ex let your children stay with you immediately after the break up, and for a long period, is proof that your children are safe with you. so don't worry. just be firm and stand your ground. in my case, the ex tried to take fridays away from me, for every other weekend. using excuse that her family gather and spend time with kids and its important 🙂 fail. the courts didn't buy that [censored].
Thanks for the reply.
Sorry I haven't been very clear in my message. The social services made a single assessment based on the allegations, and they said no further action was required to me. In their report though it is worded in a way that says because I have opened a court case they will wait to be directed by the courts.
So I went to court, they made the intern order and then directed social services to do another investigation. However, this time the social worker doing the invesgitation seems much nicer and less biased and hostile towards me.
I have primarily focused on seeing child in court application and most things thus far. However, I just cannot understand why the social workers are not doing their job and looking at the incident regarding the mother. I have asked but they will not give me an answer, surely they have a duty of care to investigate all allegations?
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