Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
we have had the child protection conference as mentioned in the previous posting and we have since had a mediation meeting.
both reiterate the fact that that contact must be improved for me ie having 'over nighters, ability to do full weekend days out but she always seems to have something planned whenever I suggest doing something even if giving more than a weeks notice of the intention.
Fixed weekends in the month is what is supposed to be happening as per the above meetings. The next child in need meeting is to happen nwxt week when again these things will be suggested but without any teeth to ensure they actually start I cannot forsee any change......... people have been urging cooperation at these meetings for the last six months without any effect.
Another friend (who is further down the road using the family court to gain access to his daughter) says whilst the court will eventually have a result it will be slow, prone to delaying tactics and expensive.
Does anyone have any experience or advice.
It really depends on the complexity of each individual case. You would be going to court with the support agencies already recommending that overnights and full weekends should have started.
Because of the involvement of Children's Services and the fact that your child is a child in need, the court will probably want a more detailed welfare report, called a section 7, this will delay your case a little, whilst CS prepare the report.
I suggest that at the next meeting you make it clear that you are ready to submit your application to court, unless you have solid agreement from your ex that overnights are to start immediately. Go in with a written schedule of contact and ask that she sign it to acknowledge agreement. Ask the social worker assigned to the case if she can facilitate contact, either by arranging to pick the child up and drop her off to you, or accompanying you to collect the child.
You can make sure ( in a non threatening way of course) that the mother understands that once a court order is in place if she didn't stick to the schedule she could be penalised by the court, which could be anything from doing unpaid work to fines or transferral of residence of the child, they can even send the parent to prison for non compliance. Obviously court should be a last resort and you can tell her that you really don't want to have to do that and thats why an agreement that she sticks to is really important. Be firm but kind!
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.