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Hi,
I am new to this and looking for any info/help I can get.
here is a little background. im sure its very similar to what a lot of other dads are facing.
I have two kids aged 8 and 5 who live with their mum. We've been separated for around 4 years and were never married. My names are on both of the birth certificates.
I could go on but to keep this short, my kids are not safe with their mother. they are neglected physically and emotionally and starting to develop issue such as anxiety and fear of leaving the house. they rarely leave their house or even attend school. their mum has made them believe they are ill and not able to leave the house. she is a master manipulator, liar, drug user and just a very bad egg.
I currently see my children ever other weekend but she wont let me speak to them in-between visits. I want to get full custody of the children as I know I can provide a better quality of life and a save and stable environment.
I attempted mediation near the start of our separation but she wouldn't respond. and the neglect issue above have been raised to social services and nothing has been done. the school are now onto her and she's going to be reported to education welfare after Christmas if the kids attendance doesn't improve.
She is now planning to move with the kids from London to Liverpool so she can be near her friend. My childrens family from both side are in London and Oxford so they will be even further from us all and this will massively effect my visits with the children.
What are my rights? can I stop her from moving the kids away? and where do I start with trying to gain full custody?
thanks
Hi there
You can try to prevent the move, to do this you would need to apply for an urgent Prohibited Steps Order. There are no guarantees that you would be successful, but it would certainly delay it whilst the court look into it further. You must tell the court that she could take the children at any time, that they are being neglected and it's important to,get in front of the court asap. If you felt she might flee if she is notified of the application, you can ask the court to hear your application "ex parte" which means that she wouldn't be informed until after the first hearing.
You can do this on form C100 and you can also use the same form to apply for the children to live with you. I would suggest that you submit form C1a with form C100 to tell the court about the serious risk of harm to your children, the fact that their schooling is suffering badly and the neglect from their mother, you would also mention the drug abuse and anything else you felt was relevant to the risk to your kids.
Concerning the move, she would need to show the court that there was adequate accommodation to go to and that she had sought school places for the children and was able to support the move financially.
Hopefully the court would request a drug test, but they're expensive and you may be expected to pay for it.
As you have Parental Responsibility, if your children are suffering badly, you can keep hold of them after their weekend contact and make the application immediately, first thing Monday morning.
As I said before there are no guarantees of success and if the court don't agree to your applications, this could make your relationship with the mother worse and your children would be stuck in the middle.
Did the Social Services give you any reason why they wouldn't get involved after the neglect was reported? It might be a good idea to get back onto them and share your concerns, ask them to log your discussion with them and inform them that because of the worsening situation and the school getting involved, you are going to make a court application to prevent the move and ask that the children live with you.
Best of luck
After you submit the application CAFCASS become involved and will be tasked with preparing a brief
safeguarding report, called a schedule 2 letter
If you have parental responsibility then you do not have to return your children if you have genuine welfare concerns but you will have to prove these concerns
she will phone the police and they will attend but as long as they feel the children are safe then they will not do anything, the mother would have to apply to court to get them back and she will unless you can prove your allegations with enough proof to convince a court and social services that they are better off with you
I would say that keeping your children and making an urgent application to court might be an option (but get advice on this) - my personal opinion is that the children not attending school is a good starting point for your argument, but you would need to be getting the children to school yourself and you'd need to make clear to the school that the mother could not pick them up, and that could be tricky without a court order, so it's a matter of timing. I would certainly get advice, and also wonder whether children's services and education welfare would support you - if so, that would help. There is a risk that it could go against you, and mojo or yoda might have more knowledge of whether this is a good idea or not as they both have a better understanding of how the system works.
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