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Hey guys
Im new to this forum and new to fatherhood
My son was born on the 11th of April and perfect
Im not with the mother and never have been we where just friends
So thought this would be a little better as there where no feelings involved
Anyway
She's not a very nice person
She stops me seeing him when i ask
She has taken him to meet my family without me knowing
She refuses to put me on the birth certificate u till she has too ( leaving it until the last second)
Well Anyway i went to her house the other day to talk about days that I could have him (i want 3 days and 2 nights) which i dont think is unfair infact I think im being really fair
Anyway she asks me if i can start off having him 2 days and 1 night building up to 3 days 2 nights
When I woke up thismorning I had a text saying she doesn't want to do that anymore as it will be "tearing" him between homes and isnt fair as he wont be able to settle and that i can work up to 2 days 1 night in a few months
Where do I stand with this? What are my rights?
I'm not letting her push me down to a part time dad as he's the both of our child and not just hers
Hi
Without a child arrangement order, she is able to decide on when and if you see your son, though a court would expect that she does behave reasonably in giving you access. Your first step is to try mediation - the court require this before you can go to court for an order anyway, but it's always a hope that an agreement can be sorted in mediation without you needing to go further, and when you let the mother know that you are intending to go down this route, there's always the possibility that she might behave more reasonably anyway.
Take a look at www.nfm.org.uk
Hi
Without a child arrangement order, she is able to decide on when and if you see your son, though a court would expect that she does behave reasonably in giving you access. Your first step is to try mediation - the court require this before you can go to court for an order anyway, but it's always a hope that an agreement can be sorted in mediation without you needing to go further, and when you let the mother know that you are intending to go down this route, there's always the possibility that she might behave more reasonably anyway.
Take a look at www.nfm.org.uk
I would try your best to agree with the mother.
If you end up in court and she refuses any overnights, the court are very likely to back her on this as your son is very young.
Most courts don't order overnight contact for very young babies unless the parents agree it.
I agree with Yoda... your son is still very young and his mum is still adapting to life as a mother, it's quite natural that she will be feeling a little protective, she carried him inside her body for nearly a year.
If you allow her to set the pace for the moment; as actd says mediation might be helpful to get a parenting plan in place. If you can both compromise and decide a schedule of increasing contact between yourselves, it will make co parenting much easier in the long run. Court will always put lots of strain on the relationship between separated parents, and as Yoda has said, the court wouldn't force the mother to agree overnights whilst the baby is so young.
I understand how frustrating it must be for you, but work with her and you will reap the rewards later on.
Best of luck
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