[Solved] First hearing - Residence (please need advice)

Hi 4fathers,

Short post from me at the moment.

Courage of your convictions is the way to go but expect a bumpy ride.

There is a FNF group in London which you may benefit from.

Chat more later.

Regards,

Dave

Hi DaveR

thanks for the support.
Would be amazing if someone could tell me also what kind of questions they do in the first hearing.

Thanks

kind regards

Hi there,

The first hearing is what is called a directions appointment. Generally you will attend earlier so that the court advisor can talk to you both to,see if there can be any agreement....as you are going for Residence this isn't likely! If she has a solicitor they will also want a meeting with you prior to going into court. They will possibly try and get you to agree to certain things and may try to intimidate you. Just remain calm and polite but if you are at any time uncomfortable, you can bring the meeting to a close. ...also try not to give too much away!

If you haven't heard from CAFCASS before the hearing the judge will ask for reports and they may be asked to compile this but because Social Services have been involved previously then it's more likely the judge will ask them to do the report, probably a section 7. As there has been police involvement the judge may want reports from them too. As you are self representing it is up to you to make the judge aware of the reasons for your application so it might be advisable to have a bullet point list of the issues you wish to raise.

There are a couple of stickys at the top of the section about representing yourself so have a read through them. It's best to be calm and reasonable, no bad mouthing the mother or talking about her in derogatory terms, this doesn't mean you can't raise concerns about her behaviour or issues you have with her as a parent ....just stick to the facts,

I meant to ask did you fill in a C1a with the C100? If you did the judge will already be aware of your concerns and the risks that you,feel your daughter has been subjected to. If you,think that the mother is taking drugs or has a problem with alcohol you can ask for testing to be done...

Hi Nannyjane,

Thanks for the info above, and yes i did fill in a C1A and a C100.

I'll have a read through the stickys about "representing yourself".

Thanks

Kind regards

Here's a link to a London based FNF meeting, it's at the Jury's Inn Hotel at Chelsea Harbour and their next meeting is on Wednesday 4th September, so just in time for you to get down there for some advice before court. Ask for Paul Taylor and tell him Jane sent you!

www.west.london.fnf.org.uk/

Thanks Jane, i'll probably go there Wednesday and get the first train to Cardiff Thursday as the hearing starts at 12:00

Thanks

Kind regards

Has the mother stopped contact after you made the court application? It might be advisable to ask the judge for an Interim Contact Order so that contact isn't disrupted whilst the case runs it course.

Heya there,

go to court with specific aims. Your one aim should be to reinstate contact if it has not happened for some time.

The first hearing is usually not that it all that it cracks up to be. Basically - allegations will be made, just say are concerned for the health an well being of your children and want to establish a permenant and consistent environment in their life - rather than what they experience already.

The meeting is at jurys inn hotel chelsea - the bar on the ground floor. Starts around 730pm. Its very good!

BW

Best of luck in court tomorrow.

Hi 4fathers - good to see you at the FNF meeting on wednesday!

Hope it was of use to you and you achieved something today in court.

BW

Hi 4fathers,

How was today in court can you comment on how you found it and how it went for you?

Regards,

Dave

Hi,

sorry for the late reply, i arrived late yesterday from cardiff.

The mother didnt show up on the first hearing on Thursday. She called me a couple of hours later saying that she thought it was at 1:00 pm.

The hearing started only with me, but they are going to set another one because she wasn't there. Both the judge and CAFCASS officer were very friendly, and told me if she misses again my testimony will have a lot of weight and that they will have to make a decision without having the mothers side of the story.

How responsible can she be if she cant even attend the court ate the right time?

Also i want to thank FNF for the meeting last Wednesday, ill be back for the next one.

Thanks

Also i found out through my daughts this weekend, that the dog she got a week before the first hearing was paid, 200 pounds.
How can she tell me that some weeks they barely have money to eat and then goes and buys a 200 pounds dog?
She buying my daughter in every way she can....its disgusting.

kind regards

Hi there,

She probably doesn't realise the importance of attending....I would be very surprised if she failed to turn up next time.

At least now you know what to expect in the court, hopefully you will have the same judge and things can moved forward at the next hearing.

I'm glad you found FNF helpful, they are good guys!

Hi all,

brief summary of of latest events:
mother didn't turn up on the 5th september hearing. A new hearing was set up for yesterday the 17th.

So this time the mother turned up.

The meeting that i thought was a remake of the first one turned out to be a second hearing. we met the caffcass officer, that was a different person from the first hearing took me and my daughters mother to a room for mediation.

Now it starts the "fun", the mediation transformed into a slinging mud fest from the mother, lies after lies after lies, she was disrespectful to me, saying in front of the cafcass officer i was being arrogant just because i smiled when i saw i wanted to see my daughter for some hours in her birthday day. she even told loud that ai had an attitude.

the cafcass officer ditn't even tell her to drop that attitude towards me. she was just bashing me all the time and i could even talk much and defend myself.
Then i asked for the cafcass assistance to try to have an agreement between us regarding vacations and half terms and weekends since my ex is no agreeing with anything.
it the started then turning in a bad way the meeting, the cafcass officer even suggested me seeing my daughter every 6 weeks for a day, when im entitled at the moment to see her every 2 weeks.

what kind of professionals are these? isnst their job to work in the best interest of the child? how can she even suggest that after knowing that im entitled to see my daughter every 2 weeks.

as we didnt agree in anything regarding residence, the meeting ended and we got back to the judge room.
again the judge seemed a different one from the first time. and way less friendly.

now things turn up to the worst, she reads my statement and she refuses to do a report under section 7, she also refused to do a separate fact finding hearing to see if there was any consequences of the domestic violence incident to my daughters.

is this a joke? how can they refuse this, my daughters been through a domestic violence incident i have valid and real reasons for concern and she denies me section 7 and the fact fiding hearing. ( and the mother doesn't even let me take her to a psychologist)

she even told me that there are no concerns from her(judge) and the cafcass officer towards my daughters healthcare, how do they know that? they didn't even file a safeguarding report yet. they didn't listen to me, they didn't give me an opportunity to explain all my reasons, even thought i wrote it in the forms.

whats is a valid reason then? my daughter being beaten? living on the streets? is this the only way they listen to a father?

this hearing was a utter joke, am i paying huge taxes every month to have the legal system just turn their back on me?

do this people really care about the best interest of the child?

also, how can a cafcass officer and a judge say " its not in the best interest of your child for you to get her in her birthday day at 7 because she will be tired and she wont enjoy, its about moments not days, and your putting your interest and not hers in front"
is this a joke? doesn't this judge play with her kids in the end of the day even if its for an hour? don;t they like it? don;t they enjoy it?

i have lost complete faith in the legal system..... people say we shouldn't sling mud in there... but looks like the mothers can do whatever they want....

looks like they made their decision when yesterday they said there as no concern from them regarding my daughter.

is there anything i can still pull up in the last hearing? anything i should write in the statement?

thanks

It might be a good idea to contact the FNF guys, maybe they can help. It might be advisable to have a McKenzie Friend on board. I would definitely ask Paul about this.

It often seems that the court and CAFCASS are one sided. Try not to give up hope.