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Hi Gents.
I like to start by saying it's nearly exactly a year when I made my first post and if I remember it started with a title of starting to live a nightmare.... Yesterday after a very long stressful year that nightmare came to the end.
I went to the final hearing yesterday and was pleasantly surprised about how it went and the outcome despite the last desperate acts of a very bitter woman (ex)
My outcome is as follows.
1) Everyother weekend sat-12pm-Sunday 6pm for 4 months then this will increase to fri6pm-sun6pm
2) Every other Wednesday evening for a couple hours however after 6 months this will move to overnight until 8am next morning.
3) 4 weeks a year holiday uk and abroad. This was my choice I could of had more in reckon but I have work commitments
4) Alternative birthdays and Xmas and new years
5) My birthday and Fathers days
Now I did challenge the lives with order however the magistrates opted to live with mother and to be made available to father and quite frankly I don't care because it's just a legal technicality and they strongly said it will be noted on the final order that both parents are equal and that she aswell as I are to give 30 days notice of taking our child abroad.
It was a pretty straight forward hearing and alot of negations going between the barristers but even with a last ditched at attempt of further false allegations by the ex I feel that she was backed into a corner and falsed to face the reality of us dad's count and they will be told that we will be in our child's life.
I'd love to put this all behind me and hopefully the ex does to I say hopefully with a slight laugh as I know she is very bitter and upon me picking my son up yesterday as it was my day ironically she had a face like thunder but I hope she just gets used to the idea without further repercussions.
All I will say to anyone in the system keep fighting until you know you done your best and victory for you and your child awaits with patients.
I'd like to thank all the moderators who have helped me along like journey. Mojo, Yoda, got the T shirt, actd and a member superprouddad who I've been talking to.
I will check in from time to time to give a little back from what I've gained from this forum. Any questions from anyone I'm happy to heap when I've got time.
I look forward to my first overnight next week where I plan a pirate themed sleepover.
Thank you all. MrB179
Nicely done Mr B179, and thank you for sharing, it's really helpful.
Having won the war, you now need to win the peace. It's hard to comprehend why some people act the way they do, but the fact is that our children love and need their moms, so we have to step up, be the adult in the room and hopefully they will adjust, see that our relationship with the child is a positive thing and move on.
Not a problem.
Although the war was won the real winner is my son who has his father for life no matter what obstacle is thrown infront of him and someone who will never give up. I came out smiling and happy at the end talking and joking with my barrister and my ex stormed off very bitter and and angry and it's a shame she sees it the way she does and is not happy and relieved it's all over but the outcome was inevitable in my eyes and and everyone should just move on which I pray she does as that was a long stressful and costly year.
After dropping off my son I had a well deserved few beers so I'm in good spirits.
Not long for you now and hopefully you get the result.
That's great news MrB! It's the least you and your son deserves and you can both now get on and enjoy life, with as many pirate themed nights as you like!
Hopefully she will come round, but watch your back as she will likely be looking for anything she can use against you...I'd love to say it's all over, but I'm conscious that for some bitter and twisted women, it's never over.
Please do come back from time to time and let us know how you're both getting on and share some of your hard earned experience!
All the best.
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