Final Hearing in progress

What was the CAFCASS recommendation? If you dont mind me asking

they gave me 4 nights every other weekend.  but ignored me telling them mother is alienating me.  however this was evident in their report when they spoke to the my youngest because she said her mum has told her all this.

cafcass also ignored the fact i did courses, said both parents should do this. i also provided evidence.  they also ignored my suggestions for diferent parenting plans, and just concentrated on the one that wouldnt work.

i have a flexible job, live near by.  where as the mother hires a nany to take kids to school, but cafcass was fine with that.  if anything i can do more than the mother.

Why the [censored] do cafcass do this?

In my safeguarding letter they totally ignored everything i said against the mother and focused on me.

cafcass do wind me up too. I showed them various pieces of evidence which show my ex was lying and they did not include it in the report. I called them and asked why they didn't and their response was "we have to seem impartial, we did highlight she lied about police call outs though" I said I would prefer it if you would highlight all of the lies she has told but they refused. I have applied to vary my order recently and cafcass are to be involved again and I know now new lies will come up which i will have to defend. 

my barrister is the one that asked the judge that cafcass be cross examined.  but because the hearing is this week, and not enough time for cafcass to come in, the judge said they can answer only 6 questions my barrister chooses via email comms.

if others read my post they know how hard a time i had.   ex run of with kids, reschooled them without my knowldge/consent.  i applied for c100 to have them return back to the area, i offered to move out.  judge approved the c100 for them to return.  ex challenged this by making every possible allegation against me.  led to me being placed in a contact centre and having a fact finding trial, all because i tried to get my kids back in the area.

anyways fact finding was cleared, so now onto this.   cafcass are not there to help fathers, i quickly realised this after the s7.  they made out there is hostility betweeen parents, but none of it comes from me, its all from the ex.   on the judgement they said the kids should be with mother.  Now im fighting against everything, as i have nothing to loose.   i got a district judge so im hoping she sees right through everything, but at same time im not holding my breathe, been so let down by the courts.

@Vik2001 Good luck on your hearing. Could I ask how long all this took? I haven't seen my son in 6 months. How much did you spend? I am on the same boat except for the house 🙁

Posted by: @edpacket

@Vik2001 Good luck on your hearing. Could I ask how long all this took? I haven't seen my son in 6 months. How much did you spend? I am on the same boat except for the house 🙁

its taken 1 year to get to the final hearing.  so far i must have spent £60k to get me up to the final hearing. i reckon another 20k on finance hearing and i be done. shes taken me to court over everything.  i said with house lets do 50/50, and just last month she served me with court proceedings over house because she wants up to 65-70%

the most expensive for me was on the contact centre visits and fact finding trial; the costs all added up, just being accused of false stuff led to some high costs for me with barristers. there was other things in between like i was accused of being a alcoholic, and had to pay £1k for a DNA hair strand and blood results, all came back fine.  nothing happend to her for making these allegations, she got away with it all, not even questioned.

not going to lie, its take a huge toll on me mentally, its financially drained me of everything, ive borrowed money etc.  its been a long road, but i never gave up on my kids just because a woman wanted me to have zero access so she could financially get enough CM out of me, as well as the family house. 

i had got interim weekend visits at my house after i got cleared of fact finding trial.  but no overnight stays.   this week i had the first overnight with my kids as i asked the judge , and judge said yes.  my kids had a great time and when they said the next day they didnt want to leave, it made everything i was doing worth while. we all had the best time.

@Vik2001 Thanks for your quick reply. It helps me prepare better as my road is just starting. It is unbelievable how they can lie and nothing happens to them. The worse thing is they know it and use it to accuse you without a single piece of evidence. I am not sure if you are aware but you can deduct the cost of visiting your children from your income for CMS calculations. I think the contact centre costs will qualify as special expenses: 

• the cost of keeping in regular contact with the child or children you pay child  maintenance for – for example, the cost of fuel to travel between your home and the child’s home

So if you earn 43k and you spent 3k on contact centres, your income for CMS would be 40k

Posted by: @edpacket

@Vik2001 Thanks for your quick reply. It helps me prepare better as my road is just starting. It is unbelievable how they can lie and nothing happens to them. The worse thing is they know it and use it to accuse you without a single piece of evidence. I am not sure if you are aware but you can deduct the cost of visiting your children from your income for CMS calculations. I think the contact centre costs will qualify as special expenses: 

• the cost of keeping in regular contact with the child or children you pay child  maintenance for – for example, the cost of fuel to travel between your home and the child’s home

So if you earn 43k and you spent 3k on contact centres, your income for CMS would be 40k

hey thats great to know, i didnt know that.  but as soon as i do that she is going to lodge a file with CMS, shes bleeding me dry.

I feel for you vic i really do. Im only at £1700 but thats before anything has even started.

Can you not try and put a costs claim in if you can prove she has acted unreasonably?

After the safeguarding letter im so tempted to record everything, illegal or not, cafcass interview, court hearings, everything. If they come any of the bias or unfairness they need to be exposed, ill publish everything.

Out of interest have you written to your mp? Im considering the same im just wondering if it achieves anything.

Can you not prove your ex is committing parental alienation?

Posted by: @mikeburry

I feel for you vic i really do. Im only at £1700 but thats before anything has even started.

Can you not try and put a costs claim in if you can prove she has acted unreasonably?

After the safeguarding letter im so tempted to record everything, illegal or not, cafcass interview, court hearings, everything. If they come any of the bias or unfairness they need to be exposed, ill publish everything.

Out of interest have you written to your mp? Im considering the same im just wondering if it achieves anything.

Can you not prove your ex is committing parental alienation?

Its very hard to claim back costs, it's just part of the process. It all spirals out of control. U work so hard and deprive yrself of things in life and the money goes down the drain like this.

I can prove she is commiting alienation,  in some ways thanks to cafcass. They asked when they interviewed my daughter why she thinks daddy is so mean, and her reply was that mummy told her. That was written clearly by cafcass in their report. On the other hand my daughter also said I'm mean to her etc etc. But before the interview I know my ex told her to say these things to the officer. My daughter even said she wants to live with mummy without being asked, and she hates coming to my house. This is what we need to expose.  So at the same time I'm saying she's brainwashing my daughter she's gna say I do it to. It's just a matter of truth coming out.