[Solved] "Final Contested Hearing"

How can a nine year old possibly be disgusted with you! At nine the courts will consider that she is not mature enough to have enough insight and to understand the implications.

I know that on the whole the authorities are loathe to accept PA but attitudes are changing slowly. I would gather as much research as possible about this and any case law where PA has been an element in the case.

Hi Mojo, already grabbing lots of Karen Woodall documentation and cross referencing existing cases involving PA/Implacable hostility etc.
As I say, will be pushing CAFCASS to investigate PA, and get it into their S7 addendum.
I need them to back me up on this one - and hopefully they will given enough of a push!

Are you on face book...so is Karen, it might be a good way to make contact with her.

Thanks Mojo, I'll look into that!

Also....I think 1626 recently posted this link which is very interesting to read with regards to PA.

http://www.coeffic.demon.co.uk/pas.htm

Tc
Kirsten

Thanks Kirsten.
I've already read that document, but thanks for flagging it just in case.

My issue isn't really identifying the PA itself, but rather getting CAFCASS to act upon it and the court to then do something about it.
Unfortunately i'm concerned that they will look at it as “to enforce, impose, or seek to enforce or impose contact would likely have adverse effects on the child”, put it all down to my daughter not wanting to see me and saying that "she'll come to contact when she is ready"...

But hey, I think i'm just overthinking things now - which is never good.
Going to prepare my paperwork for tomorrow's meeting and focus on what I need to say to CAFCASS, and what I need to "discuss" with the ex.

Cheers for all the help and advice so far guys, it's much appreciated.

BD

Good luck for tomorrow BD 🙂

There's another guy who might be worth googling, another Dad told me about him 'Brian Cantwell', he might be a bit easier to get hold of for advice than Karen Woodall...

http://www.cfcgrp.co.uk/

Just had a response from the cafcass officer.
She's provided a little feedback, but has advised that she is bringing her Service Manager on board tomorrow too, I suspect that this is in response to the negativity of the letter and of my suggestion of PA.

She has also advised that she will be talking to the eldest in a 1:1 without the mother present to try and gain an unbiased view of things.
Given that the file date is at the end of the month though, I suspect she will be requesting an extension...

Well, another quick update on this...

Meeting was fairly positive, some open discussion with the ex.
She's basically agreed to an increase of contact, including Christmas, Easter, Summer holidays and some half terms.
There were some issues around contact with the non-biological child - the ex wanted to stop contact, but has agreed with a decrease of contact for the interim... Not what I wanted ideally, but we'll see. CAFCASS suggested that she be given an opportunity to decide herself whether or not to attend, which I've agreed to.

The letter from the eldest was discussed, and the ex seemed genuinely shocked by some of it. I put forward my view that PA had occurred, and generally it was agreed that this was the case, but that my ex's anxiety could have been a contributing factor rather than a conscious attempt at PA... anyway, they discussed that basically the ex had given our eldest way to much power and control, and she needed to rein it back in. So, subject to the ex doing what she's been asked - I should be seeing the eldest for 30 minutes on Saturday... first time in 14 months.
If that goes ahead, the plan is to meet her and her mother for an hour at the next contact and hopefully progress from there to have her attend contact with her sisters.

CAFCASS are trying to get us to amicably agree everything and "not have everything defined by contact order" which is OK in principal, but in practice it gives the ex alot of room to mess me around (which is why it went to court in the first place)
I'm tempted to request that we agree a schedule within the contact order for the first 12 months, at which point it can then be looked at by the both of us. It gives a degree of structure and means we can both be held accountable if necessary...

In the first instance though, we'll see what happens on Saturday!
BD

Well without getting too excited that does sound favourable.

I can understand CAFCASS sentiments as far as reaching agreement outside of a defined contact order, but as you say it is then open to abuse once the case has gone away....would a happy medium be, if you can reach an agreement that is workable, to have the agreement written into a Consent Order. This makes it legally binding and therefore enforceable, but it's just a matter of a quick and painless attendance at court to have it rubber stamped.

Well, the eldest was there when I went to collect the other 2, but she was in the kitchen with her mum....
No contact, direct or otherwise. Didn't even get to see her.

Whilst I realise her even being there is a step forward, I'm not optimistic at the moment.
But hey, we'll see what happens in 2 weeks, when she's supposed to be attending contact for an hour.

...such a shame she couldn't be coaxed by mum into at least saying hello...do you think writing to her might help to break the ice? If your ex is doing her part as agreed she should be encouraging her to start seeing you again.