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Feeling a little deflated/sad after a Cafcass safeguarding call regarding an upcoming application.
The case relates to my youngest child, I have 3 others who I do not see very much and are alienated from me. The new case is trying to ensure my youngest doesn't go the same way, and as the only boy I want to ensure we at least have a happy normal relationship together. The other 3 were allowed to visit when they wanted, but were emotionally prevented from doing so.
The Cafcass lady on the call asked - "Do you think one of the reasons you don't see your other three children more is because you badgered them to visit?".
The question threw me and then she asked "If you were more relaxed and didn't keep asking them to do things with you, you might have had a better relationship with them."
I have never "badgered" my kids. I simply ask them over for dinner, or to spend the weekend or go to the theatre or for a meal. Is simply wanting to see your kids every now and again wrong? They are part of me and I need them in my life.
It all felt a little old school Cafcass. A father is made to feel bad and guilty for wanting a full and active part in their children's lives.
I keep hearing Cafcass is changing, although it did not feel like it in my experience.
Very sad.
hi,
I understand it can be a stressful time. in helping others, they told me it felt as Cafcass were testing their character or trying to push their buttons. hopefully they make good recommendations to court and you can restore the relation with your child, along with the others.
It's totally inappropriate of them to say that, they should never be pushing anyone's buttons. That is manipulative.
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