[Solved] Family court process

Hi there

It’s good to hear that you’ve got great info from here.

When you say three days, does that include overnight stays?

Self representing is doable, we’ve had many members that have done just that, with much success.

If agreement can be reached, its possible to let the court know at the hearing and ask for it to be put into a consent order. Although if you’re seen to agree too readily, the court can also make a no order ruling, if they think you don’t need court intervention to work together.

In my opinion the impact on the children, in asking for equal shared care or the three days, is the same. The process is the same for both. Going for more contact than you would be ok with can be useful, as it gives you room to be seen to compromise without losing too much... courts like to see parties making compromises.

The real importance of a shared care order, is not the equal sharing of time with the children, it’s the fact that the order states that the children live with both parents, h equalises parental status... when you have an order that says that a child lives with one parent and visits the other, it often gives the lived with parent a presumption that they are the more important parent.

All the best

mojo. i am one of those that have a kids live with mother order.i just know i will be back in court in future, to get permission to take kids abroad on holiday. if i was to try change that to lives with both parents, will that be unsuccessful, as i can not commmit to picking up kids and dropping them to school on regular basis?

... There’s no way of knowing whether t would be unsuccessful Bill, if you’re heading back to court, it’s worth a try... a shared care arrangement doesn’t have to have both parents perform equal tasks, or having an equal share of time with each parent.

Mojo, thanks for your message

I’m met with my ex tonight to discuss a few issues one of which was that she has told the cms I have 148 nights. We have an agreement that I have 3 nights in 7, but then makes the comment that’s term time only - new one on me but clearly meets her need to get a higher cms assessment. She refused to let me have the extra 8 nights and I adcviswd her I have no option but court to get the 3 nights a week agreement and then show this to the CMS, however also repeated my intention to go for equal shared care as that’s what the kids want so is in their best interest tomavhivw this. (they are too young to be listened to but have valid views). Got the usual it’s just about money comments back from my ex, yet she’s the one using 148 nights to get more from me.
As I said looking to self represent but not sure whether to go for equal or just get the 3 nights in a court order. 3 nights arrangement have been in place for 8 months but with some school holiday give and take (or so I thought). Don’t particularly want a long drawn out process if there is a way to achieve this outcome at the directions stage?