[Solved] False Allegations

Thanks for your reply Mojo.

Sorry I didn't reply sooner, I've been run off my feet recently so haven't had time or been online. I try to disconnect myself from it all but at times it can be hard to disconnect emotionally especially when i see how it is affecting my child. I had to sit last week and watch my little one scream and cry for me saying she wanted her daddy when the ex came to collect her. My little one is now at the age where she is beginning to speak better and has recently been saying that her older brother has been hitting her. I've mentioned this to my lawyer and that I have raised concerns previously about this.

...it's heart wrenching I know. Our only instinct is to protect our children. Without condoning it, brothers and sisters do fight... although if there is a big age difference that is concerning, all you can do is to keep bringing it up with the mother and hopefully, now your little one is more vocal about it, she will act to put a stop to it.

All the best

Thanks for the reply Mojo.

It was hard to watch last weekend, it's not often I've seen the little one like that but then seeing her then contact suddenly being stopped must have some sort of impact. I get that siblings fight, I have siblings and we fought like cat and dog growing up. There is nearly an 8 year gap between her oldest and mine. Without going into too much detail her oldest has severe issues and it's always raised concerns even when we were in a relationship.

Hello Sparky,

I hope you're doing better now than at the time the posts were written. How are you coping?

What did you do at the time to help you. I'm trying hard but it's affecting me a lot. I'm constantly thinking about my kid and believe my ex wants me to not be in my kids life and is torturing me.

My ex sounds to behave just like yours. Punishing me for leaving her by not letting me see my kid. We separated about 4 months ago after she called police and had me arrested for DV, I was released with no further action.

I didnt know where she was living For a month and a half and she was ignoring my calls and texts. In that period my child suffered from fractured wrist which I wasn't made aware about.

Contact with my son started in June but it was intermittent and she kept cancelling on me when she didn't get something from me that she wanted. My son no longer recognised me and this was damage she had caused simply for her not getting her way.

It became too much for me after 4 months when I realised she was using my son as a form to control me and I said the relationship was over and wasn't thinking of getting back with her. Since then she has stopped all communication with me, blocked me, not responded to texts about letting me see my son. I eventually submitted application to court and now waiting for hearing.

I started making child maintenance payments but then she went to CMS and got them involved. They have said her entitlement is less by just over a quid than what i was already paying her.

The FDHRA isnt till another 2 months and I'm finding it difficult. I hear these things can take long before something is decided. I'm constantly worried about what she will do to punish me further, she will frustrate the system and cause delays, throw dirt at me. Even after all this I cannot see co parenting with her being easy.

Anything you did to help you mentally and emotionally would be much appreciated

hi,

my final hearing was back in may. glad its over and proper contact arrangements in place. but the trouble will never end lol. before and after court action, the ex said on 2 occassions that i will not be seeing the kids until social services investigate such and such. on both occassions socials didnt seem bothered and said no further action.

check out this video, for co-parenting with a controlling ex: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t_2NWuswJgU

what you should do is try and socialise more with friends and family. take weekend getaways, road trips. this will help clear your mind and its much better for your sanity.