[Solved] fact finding advice

I guess you had a discussion about how to run the family finances and came to an agreement? Perhaps you could mention that in your response. Did you refuse to pay her back for the tyre or did you pay for something else instead? Or did she not want you to pay for it. You can point out that she has her own bank account and if free to spend money how she likes. Did she work or did you give her an allowance? Stick to the facts in your response

well when we got married we had a kid straight away so she wasnt working for a while so i put all the bills in my name when we moved into our house, and finacially i took care of us. when she went back to work things continued.
regarding the tyre we shared the car and i always met the expenses. but on this occasion she caused a puncture and demanded i got it fixed, because i didnt do it and i asked her to do it (2 years ago) shes now saying its abuse because she paid £100 to change the tyre. Shes also complaining that she paid for white goods in the house such as cooker, hob, fridge and table. but i always paid all the mortgage, diy, electric/gas/water/tv etc. if anything i was under more financial stress to meet the house costs.

when she worked she kept her own wages in her bank account, i didnt give her any allowance as she had savings and we managed.
i dont understand how me paying for everything is financial abuse. if i made her pay for everything then it would be abuse surely?

when she left we had a small joint bank account (£500), she closed it and took all the money out without my consent. but prior to that the joint account was only setup to store money when we moved house (from house sale) we always had separate bank accounts, and never interfered with each others finances.

If all she has to say is you did not pay for a tyre, then I wouldn't worry as the courts will just ignore that fact. It is not abuse at all, she can try and claim it is, but the fact is, it isnt. Write down all you are saying on here in bullet points and take that to court with you. You clearly were heavily involved in the upkeep of the house in terms of bills etc.

It is frustrating when these sorts of allegations are made against you, but as long as you can prove they are false, you will be fine.

i think the main issue i got is in some text i have called her a C*** (because of her behaviour in person) and a few other swear words which she is saying verbal abuse.

i also know shes made up a picture and put red lipstick over her arm and saying i twisted her up ( 2 years back) i know the picture is false. how do i approach this and how will the courts view it. i know its truly made up, probably as part of the allegations to make it look like i did something

deny everything apart from the message where u called her a C word. dont mention it in your response statement though . i would wait until u asked about it and say she called you it and plenty of other names however things were heated then and now if she wants to speak to u like that still that there is no need for you to behave like she does . It isnt good for children to witness conflict so if it was to happen again i would walk away and ignore. Make sure you highlight that you have never called a C word in person and was a text in response at the time to her abusing you 1st
Them whatsapp messages will get dismissed , if u are represented your solicitor will do as they are open to be doctored with , you not paying for a tyre is also ridiculous.

You also have heavily in your favor u have been stuck in a contact centre for no reason and now u passed your alcohol test ( another false allegation) she still has left you to attend which is not putting children first and is being done out of malice.

Ok here we go my x made up a lot of accusations of all sorts to enable them to qualify for legal aid not only that used the children against me I like you paid all the bills etc then she decided to throw the book at me and her solicitors are using her as a cash cow saying your get xwz of course not, I did not go down the fact-finding as puts to much pressure on the children that had already been poisoned by her so I was on a loser from the start and yes took out DV against all un-truths but I had not got 10-15 thousand to fight so ends in 2 weeks time has tried every avenue against me effected me big time was very close to my Daughter and that my x does use her against me of course pay CMS has done from day one, my x has gone back for more but door closed. So she is back to square 1 using my Daughter against me I'm just willing to let her forget what she saying and trip up so Yes will be going back to court when that happens all will be revealed so very important to keep all correspondence WhatApp copy all and copy text xwz my x has slipped up so many times and shown her real colours due out of frustration. As for swearing in front of the children, no one is perfect, but believe me your in for along hall keep your friends close you will need them, and start keeping records of everything meaning everything, a lot of information and help out there it's getting a lot worse. Also at present staying in the family home paying for M - bills etc x is finding it hard not working / pandemic etc time will run out so the sale of the house is on the cards at some point. At the hearing don't agree to pay the Mortgage etc maybe 3 months do not fold stand your ground and at the end of the day, they will not help you ,out to fleese you for everything you have.

Hi Vik

With more detail from you then I'd say she'd struggle to prove ginancial abuse, you just have to explain it as you have on here and stand your ground.

Re the WhatsApp, I hear what you are saying about her deleting messages, however if she did that then potentially it will become obvious as the conversation will not flow in the messages.

As others have said, you need to prepare a clear response to her allegations etc.