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I was hoping some of you may be able to give me some advise.
I ahve a 7 year old ittle girl with my ex and we have been separated 5 years, whe we split up i saw my little girl evry day more so beacuse my ex relied on me as she struggled to cope and then when she had another child with someone else she became probably more dependant on me, things like would i watch the kids while she had a bath. When i look back now it was ridicilous and a made a rod for my own back.
I met my current partner over 2 years ago and in 4 weeks we are due to have a baby ourselves, something my daughter is excited about, My daughter and my current partner have a brilliant relationship.
Problems started when about 2 years ago i told my ex, the mother of my daughter, that i wasnt going to be on call and that i would have my contact with our daughter as we had always had in place (6 nights out of every 14 due to my shifts) contact was stopped and we began the journey through family court, i didnt see my daughter for over 7 months which was awful. We had the final order hearing last november and the plan was put in writing which we had always had, all was fine until Jan this year when something didnt suit my ex she stopped contact again so i applied to court for an enforcement of the order, my ex didnt attend the first hearing in person due to floods, the roads where clear but anyways, we had to submit statements to each other and then a final hearing was set for may. This was postponed due to Covid-19 but we had a telephone conversation with the legal advisor which was a waste of time but we have a new date for end of July, im hopeful this will be able to be conducted face to face.
My ex has used coronaviurs pandemic to her advantage and stopped contact, she is now kindly offering to restart contact from fathers day as long as she can dictate who is present. She doesn't like my current partner, my family or hers and says i must always be present - so my daughter can never have a sleep over at her grandparents or go out for tea with her aunty and cousins unless im there. The judge told her in feb this was a very unreasonable request and they wouldn't order it.
My questions is does anyone have any similar experiences? Can she really try and dictate like that? she has never raised an issue during any other proceedings but now wants this control, the only person who would miss out is my daughter. Its not like when its my contact she is dropped off with someone else and i dont see her, it could be for example on her birthday her aunty wanted to take her shopping or my current partner may take her out somewhere, but my ex says this cant happen. Will a judge do a u turn and say this is a reasonable request?
Any advice would be apprecaited
Hi I had the same thing but the judge said what ever I do with my daughter is uptown me in my time she was told she can not control me in my time , to behest she still tries to but I ignor it , it costs a fortune going back and fourth to court,
Good Luck
The simple anwer is no, she can't - there is a court order in place and unless there are any concerns (which there obviously aren't), then that order stands. If you have any of this in writing (email, test etc)then it's going to look bad for her if you go back to court.
Thank you both for your reply.
I have everything in writing, i always contact her via text so i have a paper trail. She has always maintained she has no problem with my partner, and even though she has tried to have this put in an order before and the judge said no she is going to try again, i just hope the judge sees it for what it is. She is silly really in the sense she did a full 360 yesterday, texts me asking if i would like my contact to resume, of course i do, as soon as she dictates who can see our daughter and i point out there is nothing in an order she now says i cant see my daughter until we have been back to court and she has it in writing that i have to always be present.
There has been no concerns raised at all about my family, my partner or her family i do believe its just my ex trying to control the situation, its crazy really and as ive mentioned the only one who misses out would be my daughter on having a proper relationship with her extended family
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