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Hi all,
I am currently going through court to get a child arrangements order as my ex has stopped me seeing my three year daughter old for absolutely no reason apart from her being selfish and extremely immature. I went through mediation last September and we are still going through court now and I have seen my daughter once for two hours in the past year.
At the last hearing it was decided that I could see my daughter in a contact centre for the first two sessions which start next weekend (due to the fact I haven't seen her for so long.) Then every other weekend at my brothers house until the next hearing in April.
She has already lied numerous times in her C7, lies which I can prove are untrue. But nobody in the court has brought any of the allegations she has made up for me to have my say. Lies such as that I psychologically and emotionally abused her and my daughter. Which is all apparently verbally. Also this is untrue.
As my brother has agreed to supported contact at his home, my solicitor has sent him a letter to tell him the dates and times that he will need to be available which he has to sign and send back. It says nothing else in there. My ex has decided to go to my brother and tell him that he must make notes about the time I arrive, leave and feed my daughter. Now of course, my brother isn't a professional in anyway shape or form. He is just going to be in the same house as me when I see my daughter. I'm sure if this was true it would state it in the letter he has received from my solicitor. She has worried my brother now as it states on the letter that he could face prison if he does not stick to the agreement. I know this is rather dramatic and worse case scenario but is she allowed to lie to him like this? I am going to ask my solicitor on Monday when they reopen but it's bugging me that she has lied and lied and lied and no one seems to care about that.
She has also gone to my brothers ex who she is friends with and told her details of the case, to which she has now rang my brother too, to give her opinion on it. This has caused a lot of problems for my brother who is only trying to do me a favour by helping me.
Now I have had a look online and from what I can see she should not be talking to anyone about the court case at all unless they are directly involved in the case or she could be held in contempt of court. Is this true as I hope some kind of action is taken as her immaturity is just causing more and more problems and I just want this whole thing to be over as soon as possible.
Thank you in advance for any comments. I really appreciate it.
Hiya,
From my experience in court the judge never really went through each of the allegations , my ex had literally ticked every type of abuse. I just made notes on each item and raised some in court if I got the chance like risk of abduction saying I live here my family here my job here etc and let the judge make his/her mind up. Once you have proved some of the allegations false I think they will see through the rest. I even asked for a finding of fact, which was a bluff really as it would have been a pain in the a**e but the judge said I don't think that will be required, also really try not to raise any of these in the section 7 keep it child focused only and don't attack mum at all, probably easier to say good mum just misguided about me .
In terms of your contact moving forward, mine was similar with center then my mum overseeing. Ex tried to make this a point in court saying by the progression I show that I can't be left alone. My response was I have parental responsibility and when my boy is with me I accept full responsibility for him my mum is only present to facilitate contact not to oversee it and her being there was to help my ex feel better about leaving my son with me. Judge agreed and wrote as much in the final order. This should be the same with your brother you have parental responsibility thus you are in charge he is just present
In terms of contact diary it still annoys me to today, just do what she wants write what she ate, and when when she slept and what she did etc this would save your brother from doing it.
Good luck hope it helps
Hi there
Try not to worry about this, reassure your brother that supported contact means that his duties are outlined in the solicitors letter and there is no need for him to keep a written record, just as long as he remains at home, that's all that's required of him.
Your solictor will be able to reassure your brother, but it might be a good idea for the solicitor to write to her (or her solicitor) and tell her not to contact your brother concerning the contact, and to do so again would be considered harassment.
Anything that is discussed in court, or any paperwork that is generated, is in the strictest confidence, she should not be discussing it with anyone that isn't a party to the case. Again your solicitor should inform her of thisin writing...he may wish to copy in the court, as it usual for correspondence that goes between the parties to be filed with the court too.
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