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Dispute over access...
 
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[Solved] Dispute over access times (Statement of Access)


Posts: 10
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Topic starter
(@Jules73)
Active Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Hello there,

I will be unemployed in a month from now, and currently just started divorce proceedings, in the process of filing my Statement of Access form to arrange when I can see my son.

My wife wants me to only see my son on weekends, 2 hours a day (so 4 hours a week), but with my being out of work soon I will have a lot more time and resource to see our son (he's 17 months old).

I don't think she's being fair. It is understandable if I'm in employment that I can only see him in the weekends, but as this won't be the case soon I want to see him more.

What happens if we continue to disagree about the Statement of Access (we obviously need to agree on something for me to submit it)? will this go to court? if so, what are my chances then of demanding more time with my son? any pitfalls?.

Thanks in advance for your help,
Jules

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7 Replies
 actd
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(@dadmod4)
Joined: 15 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 11890

ultimately, your ex is able to say what access you have unless there is a contact order in place, so if your ex doesn't agree, then applying for a contact order is your only option if you can't agree to the level of contact, and then it's for the court to decide what the level of contact should be.

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(@Jules73)
Joined: 12 years ago

Active Member
Posts: 10

Thanks for that info actd, I noticed the useful sticky topic by Yoji on what contact orders are, so I'll do some more reading on what it entails, unfortunately it may well go down that route as my wife has been incredibly uncooperative with any attempts to reach some middle ground.

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(@Ivan Dobski)
Joined: 12 years ago

Reputable Member
Posts: 181

If you go down any legal route for contact ensure that any contact is mentioned in the court order ie dates/amount of time etc.

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(@dad-i-d)
Joined: 14 years ago

Noble Member
Posts: 1306

Just a quick one...... I think you will need to show that you have tried mediation before the courts will look at contact orders.

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(@Jules73)
Joined: 12 years ago

Active Member
Posts: 10

Thank you both Ivan and dad-i-d for the helpful advice.

I will certainly offer mediation through the solicitors (which will no doubt go the way of other similar offers I made), and will make note of it, as well as specify times and dates when it comes to the court order.

I always live in hope that she can see some sense and realise I'm not even asking for 50% access, but 4 hours a week is ridiculous, and I deserve more especially when I have more time,. Then again if reason was applied we wouldn't be in this position in the first place.

Thank you all for the help.

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(@Jules73)
Joined: 12 years ago

Active Member
Posts: 10

I like your auto sig by the way dad-i-d 😉 , I sincerely hope karma does exist, and I too am going through [censored], this whole process does make you evaluate humanity, and the amount/lack of goodness in certain people, but I can only hope the future's ours. I have to 🙁 .

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(@dad-i-d)
Joined: 14 years ago

Noble Member
Posts: 1306

I always live in hope that she can see some sense and realise I'm not even asking for 50% access, but 4 hours a week is ridiculous, and I deserve more especially when I have more time,. Then again if reason was applied we wouldn't be in this position in the first place.

Thank you all for the help.

That was my thinking 2,1/2yrs ago when i started this....i wasn't asking for 50/50 spilt time with my son........i just wanted more than the 3-4hrs she was "allowing me" and making me feel i was asking for the world!

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