Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hello there,
I will be unemployed in a month from now, and currently just started divorce proceedings, in the process of filing my Statement of Access form to arrange when I can see my son.
My wife wants me to only see my son on weekends, 2 hours a day (so 4 hours a week), but with my being out of work soon I will have a lot more time and resource to see our son (he's 17 months old).
I don't think she's being fair. It is understandable if I'm in employment that I can only see him in the weekends, but as this won't be the case soon I want to see him more.
What happens if we continue to disagree about the Statement of Access (we obviously need to agree on something for me to submit it)? will this go to court? if so, what are my chances then of demanding more time with my son? any pitfalls?.
Thanks in advance for your help,
Jules
ultimately, your ex is able to say what access you have unless there is a contact order in place, so if your ex doesn't agree, then applying for a contact order is your only option if you can't agree to the level of contact, and then it's for the court to decide what the level of contact should be.
Thanks for that info actd, I noticed the useful sticky topic by Yoji on what contact orders are, so I'll do some more reading on what it entails, unfortunately it may well go down that route as my wife has been incredibly uncooperative with any attempts to reach some middle ground.
If you go down any legal route for contact ensure that any contact is mentioned in the court order ie dates/amount of time etc.
Just a quick one...... I think you will need to show that you have tried mediation before the courts will look at contact orders.
Thank you both Ivan and dad-i-d for the helpful advice.
I will certainly offer mediation through the solicitors (which will no doubt go the way of other similar offers I made), and will make note of it, as well as specify times and dates when it comes to the court order.
I always live in hope that she can see some sense and realise I'm not even asking for 50% access, but 4 hours a week is ridiculous, and I deserve more especially when I have more time,. Then again if reason was applied we wouldn't be in this position in the first place.
Thank you all for the help.
I like your auto sig by the way dad-i-d 😉 , I sincerely hope karma does exist, and I too am going through [censored], this whole process does make you evaluate humanity, and the amount/lack of goodness in certain people, but I can only hope the future's ours. I have to 🙁 .
I always live in hope that she can see some sense and realise I'm not even asking for 50% access, but 4 hours a week is ridiculous, and I deserve more especially when I have more time,. Then again if reason was applied we wouldn't be in this position in the first place.
Thank you all for the help.
That was my thinking 2,1/2yrs ago when i started this....i wasn't asking for 50/50 spilt time with my son........i just wanted more than the 3-4hrs she was "allowing me" and making me feel i was asking for the world!
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.