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What age do the courts listen to what children want. I have recently had reason to call in social services for hitting and emotional abuse of my 9 year old daughter. In their wisdom they have decreed that my well behaved daughter has too much of a good time with me and her grandmother that she should see less of us and spend more time with the woman that constantly tells her she is stupid and bullys her. I plan to try for full custody and any advice would be greatly appreciated. I am absolutely devasted at this course of action. She has even taken the Sim card out of her phone that I bought her so as she can't keep in contact. She isn't allowed to use the computer now either in case she contacts my mothers. She did tell SS that she was unhappy at home and that her mother hit her and she wanted to live with me.
Hi Farrier,
Welcome the the site,
I'm not sure at what age the courts will talk to the children, I would imagine that if the courts were to take the views of your daughter into account it would be a social services or caffcass that talked to her and reported back to them.
You say you called in SS due to hitting and emotional abuse, i'm guessing this was from her mother so seems strange they would want to recommend that your daughter spend longer with her mother.
I would imagine another member actd will be along at some point and he may have some advice on going for full custody.
Keep checking back in for more replies.
Darren
We haven't got as far as courts yet. Social services interviewed her mother and then my daughter last week and I had to attend an interview today and was devasted when they gave me there findings. I just cannot see the rationale for it. Its utter madness to cut her access to people that love and care for her and make her spend more time with someone who abuses her. I am beginning to wish I hadn't said anything in the first place at least then I could see her every week.
Hi and welcome to the forum
In answer to your question about how old children are before the courts will listen to them, there's no hard and fast rule, in my own case, my older daughter was 13 at the time I was in court for custody and contact hearings and the cafcass report was quite clear that she was old enough to know the consequences of the fact that she didn't want contact with her mother and the court agreed with cafcass. I don't think the court would have a have agreed if she had been much younger though, so in my opinion (and it is only an opinion) your daughters opinions would be sought by cafcass, they wouldn't necessarily go on that alone.
I think since social services are involved, it's worth getting an opinion from the family rights group, so I'll ask them to pop on and give an opinion and we can go from there, so keep checking back here.
Hello
I am an adviser at Family Rights Group- we advise parents and other family members when children’s services (new name for social services) are involved in the family.
Sorry to hear about the difficulties you and your daughter are having.
From what you have described, it sounds as though children’s services were not involved in your family until you contacted them to raise your concerns. Following your contact, they conducted an initial or core assessment. Is that right?
What was the formal outcome of children’s services assessment? Are they suggesting that your daughter is a child in need, for example, or do they feel she is at risk of harm?
It is important to establish exactly what role children’s services are taking as they do not have any actual authority to make decisions about contact arrangements etc. Only the court can do this.
If they have assessed that your daughter is “in needâ€, they should draw up a child in need plan which may include recommendations about contact but they cannot enforce these recommendations if you do not agree.
Once the courts are involved, they will ask another agency (either CAFCAS or children’s services) to meet with your daughter in order to provide a report to assist with their decision making. This report should clearly represent what your daughter has said but might not reach the same conclusions about what is in her best interests.
I would advise you to try to work co-operatively with children’s services as much as possible as they may become involved in the court process. It is reasonable, however, for you to question the recommendation that has been made.
Perhaps you could arrange another meeting with the social worker to ask them to clarify the situation? Alternatively, you could put this is writing. You may wish to raise some of the following points,
• What assessments have been carried out in relation to my family to date? Could I have copies of these assessments?
• What further assessments are planned or underway and what are the timescales for these?
• What, specifically, is the role of children’s services in my family at the current time? Is my daughter assessed as a child in need, for example and, if so, can I have a copy of her child in need plan?
• What are your current plans regarding continued involvement in my family in the short and longer term? Again, what are the timescales for making these decisions?
You may wish to raise your concerns about the recommendation that is being made and highlight why you feel this is not in your daughter’s best interests. It is also useful to emphasise that your daughter is your priority, that you contacted children’s services only out of concern for her welfare and that you are keen to work in partnership with them to promote her best interests.
I would certainly advise you to discuss the above with your solicitor if you have one. I would also advise you to have a look at our advice sheets which give details about the roles and responsibilities of children’s services. They can be accessed on our website here: http://www.frg.org.uk/need-help-or-advice/advice-sheets
Finally, you may wish to make your daughter aware of NYAS (national youth advocacy service) as this is an agency that she could contact for advice and support herself. Their website can be found at http://www.nyas.net/
Please do post again if you have any other specific questions about the role of children’s services in your family. Alternatively, you are welcome to call our free advice line on 0808 801 0366
Best Wishes
Adviser
Family Rights Group
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