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Hi all,
Posting here after a dissapointing day in court. We have a court order that stipulates contact every other weekend and wednesday midweek, for my 11 and 13 year old. My ex has now managed to get the midweek contact removed, what she actually asked for in court was to make midweek 'flexible' so that the children only come if they want to. They are heavily influenced by her though. She argued, the journey was too long, they may have homework to do (so no point in coming), etc. None of which are issues the children have ever raised, just her.
But actually the court have ordered that midweek contact should stop and replaced by contact on Sunday evening - Mon morning, on the non contact weekend.
I am pretty shocked as this is not going to work for her, me or the kids - they were completely happy with the mid week arrangement. The judge said the journey was too long (it is nearly an hour), but they are used to it and have said they wanted it to continue. Their thoughts have never been listened to by the court
We have ended up with something that is not ideal for anyone, let alone the kids. I can appeal, but even my solicitor said it is very difficult once a decision is made, as have to prove a procedural error. So I guess I just have to live with this. Just sad for the kids, they like seeing me during the week and their younger sisters at our house.
anyone got any thoughts/ advice?
hi,
was this your first court application? I think it is still a good arrangement. I have similar, have kids fri-mon every other weekend, and an alternate monday night. am hoping I can get increased time with kids. my ex did protest about the monday night, like will be long commute to my place etc, and I just told cafcass I will drive and often it can take 30-40 minutes at best. at worst it can take over an hour if roadworks and crazy traffic.
If it’s not suitable to your ex either, could you not talk to her and come up with something you can both agree on. Maybe you could then get a solicitor to draw up a consent form, which the courts could authorise for you, without the need to attend court again.
40-60min drive to or from school isn’t uncommon. I am surprised that judge deemed it as too long but the court has discretion to make orders that are in the best interest of a child whether the parents agree or not.
In some cases they order mid week contact for a few hours after school. However I understand that it doesn’t allow for depth connection.
Like Warhammer said. It might be best if you and your ex come to an amicable agreement without the court.
Thanks. My frustration is that the court just didn't seem to listen to my view at all or look at evidence. Or indeed even ask about the children's opinions.
We have an existing order that has been working fine with contact on a weds.
My ex does not want contact, based on reasons like her own jealousy rather than what is best for the kids. Unfortunately it is very difficult to agree anything with her, more likely that she will allow contact when it suits her, as before our previous order
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