Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
My son has raised his 9 month old son himself. His sons mother was pregnant when she left. She gave birth a week ago and despite asking everyday my son has not been permitted to see his daughter. Apparently it's because she is breastfeeding and 'shes still too little'. It's more annoying because he did it all before with their son and continues to do a fab job. I believe she will never allow contact out of spite. Is there some kind of recommended contact for infants? What do you think the court would grant? She could breastfeed for years! Surely that's not sufficient reason to prevent contact. Has anyone experienced this or have some advice? Many thanks
Hi there
Does the mother not see her son?
With newborns, particularly where the mother breastfeeds, courts would generally order short frequent visits.
As the baby is just a week old, it's much better to try and negotiate between themselves, if she won't agree to any contact then mediation would be the next step, if that fails then a court application can be made.
Has she agreed to your son going on the birth certificate? If this hasn't been discussed, then mediation might be a good way to try and get some agreement in place.
If she sees her son, it would make sense for that to be combined with your son seeing his daughter.
It's a difficult time, the mother may feel she needs to control the situation with her new baby, as she lost control with her first child, this might be a reason for her to be obstructive, it could be out of fear, as much as spite. Her hormones will still be in full swing, give it a little time and she may be more accommodating. I do hope so.
Try and get them to talk about getting some arrangements in place, the children as siblings need to have a relationship too.
All the best
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.