[Solved] Contact with children

Hi Steve,

If I am understanding correctly then you are getting access as agreed except for the midweek visit where you have not had contact?

With the above understanding;
She could argue that she is making the child available and it is you who do not turn up for contact.
That said, you have been asking for weeks for the midweek contact to be moved to a Friday and discussions between you have broken down.

You could consider, writing a letter explaining and asking her to consider the change to current contact. If you look at your court order it is likely to say that the order has something like, "and other alternative contact as agreed" written in it.

If it says that in the order you could point that out in the letter and give reasons that support your childs needs and best interests by switching days. Such as not losing out on time with you, Friday is a better night to do things with the child, etc, etc, Ask that she gives reasons for refusing on the grounds you can try to address them. You could also add that you suggest attending mediation together so that a trained mediator can assist you both in tring to reach agreement or compromise.

If there is no response or discussions break down again then you may wish to consider going back to curt for a variation order to have the dates and times changed.

The courts now make it mandatory that you attend mediation. If the other party fails to show or mediation breaks down then the mediator can sign your C100 application to court. You wont be able to submit a C100 court application unless you attended mediation.

Its best to try mediation but if mediation fails then the only alternative is to ask the court to decide which ma or may not go in your favour.

Also dont forget that if you apply to court your former may become more difficult, seems to be the norm.

However, you always have those on this forum to support you and offer theyre experience.

Regards,

Dave

I have the contact on Tuesday after school , but as my shift as changed to afternoons I'm no longer able to pick them up apart from Fridays which I don't work,
Mediation is a no go as SHE refused both times also she refused a caf meeting at school to see if it could be resolved , as I fear it'll be back to court again.
So as she's not letting me have any other acess ( as stated in the order ) she is in fact in breach of it ?

As any extra time is "as agreed by both of you" that would be difficult to enforce. I think the fact that your working hours have been changed by your employers and your ex is refusing to be flexible then you could return to court to vary the existing order.

Since April mediation has now become compulsory before a court application can be made, so you would need to attend mediation for a MIAM. They would then contact your ex and request she attend, if she refuses the mediator would sign off the C100 form for you to submit to court.

You could then ask for extra time to be defined, for instance 50/50 shared holidays, or however much is suitable for you, shared alternate birthdays and Christmas and because of the new work commitments you could ask for the alternate Fridays to replace the Tuesday. You could even ask for the weekend contact to be extended so that you had them Friday through to sunday....whichever suits you better.

My thoughts exactly
Thanks very much